It's begining to feel a lot like Christmas

November is nearly over and December is coming up fast. What a bummer. Only a few more weeks until Father Christmas squeezes his way down the chimney.

With Christmas come traditions. Like having a few too many on Christmas Eve and then having to front up for meal consisting of 14 different kinds of meat and vegies. Excellent, time to open the third, and forth, stomachs. Part of this tradition sees us off to a friends house for ‘Light Up’.

What’s light up I hear you ask? It’s when this friends father gets all the Christmas lights that he can and puts them up on his house. This years was very inspiring. They are also most welcoming which is very nice. This year’s effort was excellent. Lots to see and many flashing lights to please the kiddies. Here are some photos of them.

Apparently there are some people who drive around the same places each Christmas to see what’s new. I’ve done this, and there is no shame in it. It makes people feel good so go for it.

I have to start shopping also. One year, I did all my Christmas shopping in 25 minutes at South Melbourne Market. Everyone got good, durable presents, might do the same this year. And instead of those season's tickets my partner wants, she might get a spanner. She has never used one, but imagine how surprised she will be when she opens the box. Magic time, Christmas.

That was on Saturday night, on Saturday I worked the bar at the club. We have a pest. He comes in an hassles people. Doesn’t do it to me, but does to other people. I tell him off, and he only buys packaged beer now, takes it home and drinks in the peace of his home. Good on him.

I am looking at getting a phone through work now. Mine is old and in need of replacement, so they can get me one, and a new car kit, for I need both. I am off to Bendigo and Echuca tomorrow for some work related work stuff. It is supposed to be hot too, so that will be nice, and the car will get hot too.

Have to be back in Melbourne for a 7 PM session of the new Harry Potter film. The young dude who plays Harry is getting more expressions with each film, which is good. Should be good. Time to go.

Here come Xmas!

It is now only five weeks to Xmas. Jeez, that has come up quickly. It was only last year that I was complaining about the season. This year it is different. I have taken to being nice about Xmas. I guess it’s because there are some reasons to be cheerful (part 3).

My sister is up the duff and expecting in the New Year, that’s good news, and my niece is looking better than ever, after her troubles earlier this year. Although she is still young and will probably prefers the paper to the toys. But don’t we all.

Most Xmas’s at our place involve Dad banging on about putting the paper in the bag, someone else getting a present for someone else, due to the complicated nature of our Xmas day, and mum needing a nap in the afternoon after making a 14 course banquet, with little or no help from dad. That’s not entirely true, dad does light the BBQ. And he yells at you for opening the lid too often.

A couple of years ago, my nephews from Townsville were down. Shit, they make a lot of noise. Good on them. We managed to stir them up a bit, which is always fun. And they were keen to get me beer, which is also fun.

Anyway, I have recently sent my partner a list of potential presents. Here they are either this one, or this radio from Tivoli audio. I already have the table radio, and with the iPod, and since I travel a bit, the radios in motels are shit or non existent so one of those would be good for me.

The other is this. I reckon it looks great. I live in a flat so I can’t have an animal companion, but a robot that talks – tres bein! It walks around and talks by itself and fights stuff. Now that’s what I’m after. I will train him to be my slave. He can get me things from the fridge. I’ve heard you say, he can’t do that! He will fucking learn how to. Otherwise he might get a foot up his robotic arse. He can follow a laser pointed on the ground too. I am going to have fun walking him into walls!

The other present is a watch (it's the one with the blue face). It is the same one worn by Steve McQueen in 'Le Mans'. It's pretty pricey, so I don't think I'll be seeing it until I win Tatts. Come on George, Tatts me outa here!

I will have to wait and see what Father Christmas brings me won’t I. After getting a PS2 last year, anything is possible, and Xmas is truly a time of miracles!

Here's a photo of a mate and I at another mate's wedding. Christ she looks small next two those two handsome chaps who have obviously been in a good paddock.

Stupid thing I did once

One Friday afternoon, my offsider and I were bored.

He was wasting time looking at a dating site. We decided to put up a profile. The profile will remain nameless, but it was an ace name. We gave him attributes like, listening, shopping, bathing, person upkeep, mentioned that his favourite movie was Terms of Endearments (fuck that was a sad film) and other such rubbish. Our aim was to make him the most appealing man a woman could get.

We couldn’t get a photo of ourselves and load that up as it would be pretty obvious to anyone who knows either of us, that we aren’t this bloke. However, we were toying with the idea of taking a photo of a worker from the building site we were on and using him as the person. We didn’t though, as I think we might have been punched up.

Anyway, we put the profile up, set up a hotmail address and waited. Soon we got a few emails. These poor women must need men. I was single for a while, and I think that chicks are a bit too fussy. Some of them can be very superficial as well. I’m over that shit now, but fuck, you log onto those sites and there are a lot of single ladies out there (so I’m told, honey).

What’s up with women today? I think they want too much. It’s the same with many things; they have been allowed to get away with too much. Blokes are the same. When I was 18 I went to a university in the country. Christ I learnt a lot very quickly. I was straight out of an all boy’s school and thrown in with 11 other people from across Victoria. How’s that! I had no idea then. And I think it is the same for most people today. They stay at home for too long and don’t get to experience the things that I did. I’m not saying that it was all good and above board, but I, generally, had a good time.

I’m told that the women on the site want ‘soul mates’ and ‘no game players’. Here’s a tip ladies, blokes aren’t into that. At least not the people I used to hang around with. I’ve always been more of a beer-in-the-public-bar kind of guy than a night clubber or anything else. Women need to get into these places, as there is a wealth of single men in these places.

Nightclubs are shit. At least they were about 10 years ago when I last went into one. The local public bar has lots of interesting people, and they are probably more honest and reliable than those you meet in a night club. I met my partner of 8+ years in a hotel, and we are still going strong. Sure you might get to meet a few drunks with their arses hanging out, but they will be pretty decent to you and you will enjoy yourself.

It’s fun in hotels. I’ve been in them for a long time. Now I’ve graduated onto a club, but the principle is basically the same. When we used to associate with some of my partner’s friends, the females used to belt on constantly about their ‘failed relationships’ and how hard it is to find a man.

Pull your head in. It’s probably you.

You’re too fussy and looking in the wrong places. And you’re not getting any younger. You won’t meet a decent man at the gym. Some ponce who shaves his chest – yes. A man who will impress you with his drinking ability – no!

There you go sister. Get into the pub, order a pot, put a bet on the greyhounds, and meet a few lonely men. There are lots there. They are nice and clean, up for a chat, and ready for love. Get into it girls, you need to break out of your normal routine and get into something different. You go girl!

On line photos

I have started to upload my photos onto my Flikr site. Mind you, there are a few. I will put them up as I can.

I have also been to South Korea, as my friend from university Phillip lives over there now. Here is a photo of him and his mate when we went out to a Korean BBQ, he is on the right, I think it is Garry who is next to him. Garry was a nice bloke too, who moved to Singapore, I think. I only met him once. Seemed like a nice bloke. I hope to get back to Seoul one day, as it is a lot of fun and also very cheap. I have Google Earth installed so I get to see all the places I have been before. Fuck, it is a long way to Europe. That is the reason for the thought of going back to Korea. It is a great place. It was cold there too in Nov 04. Not that bad though.

I also hope to take my partner, as I think she would enjoy it. It is different from anywhere she has been, and it is only about 14 hours from Melbourne, all up, opposed to 28 or something to London.

Anyway here is a photo of the palace near the centre of Seoul. I mainly only stayed in Seoul, as it was kinda difficult to get out of there by myself. And I had a couple of massive freak outs, which I am not proud of, but stiff shit, that’s how it goes.

Seoul is a very big city. And I think this added to my freak outs, as I was not used to so many people in the one place. There are a lot of people. I don't know why I freaked out, perhaps it was the long trip over, probably. The second freak out was after the photo above of Phil. I had a bit too much Cass, and thought I lost stuff. It ended up with me yelling at the poor cabbie and other unpleasantness. Oh well. Can't win them all.

I did go to the DMZ, that was pretty sad. A countly divided, man. That's pretty shit. There are something like 50,000 families who have relatives in the north and can't see them. They are all fucked up there anyway. The Dear Leader is a shonk. I will revisit this topic in another update. I know people love my crazy rants. Look forward to it people.

I also went to the USO over there too. I actually went on Thanksgiving day, so I had a big turkey dinner. Here it is. It only cost me like US$7, so it was pretty cheap. Anyway, have a look at my online photo album, I will be adding more photos as I can.

I will take a shot of my camera and other stuff to, so the eager can see what I use when out and about.

A new update

I have been accused, hurtfully so, of not updating this blog. Well. I never. It is true that I have been a tad remiss in my blogging duties, but that will soon stop. As I perceive some extra time now that work has slowed down a bit.

Anyways. What up with Delta Goodrem? Christ. She gets jack the dancer and next thing she is the spokes person for it. I’m sure it was a shitty time for her (she lost her hair), but considering that she asked for ‘privacy’ when she was battling it, now all she wants is to be seen helping out sick kiddies.

Cancer is shit. I’ve never had it, and I know people who have had amputations due to it. So it is a fucked thing to happen to anyone. Delta, give it a breather. If you want to help the sick kiddies out, give them some of your cash. I bet you’ve got a roll a kangaroo couldn’t jump over. Fuck, your ‘man’ is some weak chinned pasty Irish singer, who I think sounds not dissimilar to a goat sneezing while farting at the same time (isn’t that a strange feeling), and you are always in Blighty or somewhere else than Oz, so you must have heaps of cash. I bet you don’t’ fly economy either.

I probably shouldn’t be so hard on Delta. She is an Aussie girl who has done well overseas, and she’s only 21. Although I believe she is starting to morph (that’s old skool) into Kate Bush. She does have an undies range, but I bet it isn’t her in those smudgy ads I’ve briefly seen in the trashy magazine my partner brings home (when we were at university, we used to play a game where we used to try to match up the bra ads with the panty ads. That keep me MY FRIENDS and I amused for quite some time.). Perhaps it is, that would make me forgive a few of her errors.

When I was 21, I still had my finger firmly up my arse and my head in the clouds.

Anyway, I wouldn’t buy any of her CDs, as her music isn’t my cup of tea. But it is somes. Go for it if it is. This numb nut who used to work here was into her. I think it was a bit freaky. Like those freaky story lines in SVU: Special Victims.

Well, that’s it for this rant of a crazy man. I did check out her website and it was a pretty good. No doubt some young blokes are floating thier boat to the pictures on there. She does seem to spend a lot of time looking into the camera or walking along the beach, in free flowing dresses. Bet those photos weren't taken in Ireland or England where he man is from. She woudl be cold, have sore feet from walking on a peebley beach, and there would be amy untanned white people sitting in string singlets with hankies on thier heads.

The articles on her related to something called thankyou day. Fuck, that day isn’t my day. not now not ever. I rarely get a thank you. Good to see she’s helping out, but not in the monetary sense. The PR company needs a foot up thier bums, as that was the first time I'd heard about it. Thank you day was on Monday too. New consultants next year, I think.

I'm old and mellowing a bit, so people, please stand as I declare Delta Goodrem an Australian Legend. Good on you love.