The world seems difficult

Jim and Max

2011-09-17T20:40:00.002+10:00

On Friday 16 September, my partner and I welcomed two new additions to our family. Jim William Earle and Max Robert Gordon. Having more than one child means you can choose extra names!

Twin boys, who are doing well, but are in special care as they were four weeks early.

My partner is doing well and should be out of hospital on Tuesday, all going well. Then it will be daily visits to the hospital for the next two - three weeks until the kids come out.

Good times indeed. I know they will give me grief, and cause me stress, but I want them both (and my daughter) to thoroughly enjoy life. I'll do everything I can to help them achieve that.

There's photos on my Flickr site now, and I'm updating them all the time.

Been a while

2011-08-19T16:37:00.002+10:00

Shit, has been. What's been going on?

Lots.

Partner is pregnant with twins, most people know this. And we even have names worked out. They are going to get first names that are similar in one way, the two middle names. Just like me and Charlotte.

She's growing up too. Nearly three, and a real talker. Plus she's got her Mum's feet.

I'm selling the pram as it's no good to us any more. There's a twin stroller in the garage now waiting to be put together. Ugh...

Have to move my desk and office too from a bedroom to a landing. This has meant a re-evaluation of my computer stock. Work gives me a computer, which I think I'll keep in a bag when I'm at home as it's pretty crap. I'm going to buy me a Mac Mini. Got a screen and keyboard/mouse, so don't need them, but if I become a fanboi, I might upgrade later on. Going to get a NAS drive as well. Too many ext HDD and need to get things in one place.

Saw this great desk, but it's pricey and not big enough, so the Ikea one I've had for a while will do. Tomorrow the jigsaw comes out to lop off 200 mill from what is now the front (soon to be the back) and the move will begin. Bit of work to do on this office move. And I suspect I'll be working out of the RACV Club and the garage a bit more often once the twins come along.

Looking at a Sonos system as well. But this will be a gradual thing. Gotta get permission first. The OXX can stream music so this will do for a while.

Anyways, I've jsut downloaded Caitlin Rose's CD Own Side Now. Most impressive, her EP, Dead Flowers, was great and this is a bit less bluegrass, but still excellent.

This is the debut single, Own Side, have a look:

http://youtu.be/GxQ9HS7Ao1I?hd=1

Richard Hawley

2010-03-06T12:27:00.006+11:00

I like Richard Hawley. He was in Pulp. Also known as the Sinatra of Sheffield. His most recent CD 'Truelove's Gutter' was #2 in Mojo's CD of 2009. It is good. Interestingly, all his CDs are named after parts of Sheffield.

I sing this song to Charlotte and she loves it, so this is one of my favourites. It's from Coles Corner.

This isn't the official video clip, but has better sound. The MAN won't let me embed the official clip, so this is what you get.

Here's one off the new CD Truelove's Gutter, very poignant:

For more rockin' goodness, just do a search on Richard Hawley in YouTube.

Pretty World

2010-01-19T14:35:00.002+11:00

Been a bit down lately.

Just the shit that goes into a normal life.

So I got into my iTunes and played the song below. Sam Baker was in a terrorist attack in South America and he sings about it on 'Mercy', but Pretty World is from his CD of the same name. I've got to get the next one 'Cotton', but they are import only here.

Anyways, play this and enjoy. I always do.

Great Lake Swimmers

2009-12-11T11:57:00.002+11:00

If you haven't heard them, this is a good intro to this ace Canadian band. It was recommended by Mojo magazine, and I've since purchased the whole catalogue, which sadly isn't available here. The latest CD, Lost Channels, is excellent, but this song was my introduction to them.

Enjoy.

Things I've learnt about having a child Part 4

2009-08-28T14:56:00.002+10:00

Part 4 - Birth

Not something I'll ever experience. Women say 'you try and pop a water melon out of your cock' as some sort of comparison. I'll never do that, but when I was 18 I had a wee that lasted 10 minutes and made me weak in the knees. Like most men, I've also tried to we out of my erect penis with little success. I think I've said part of this before, but fuck it.

As I've said, we had a Caesar. It was all very hospital-ish. They made me wear some white overalls. The nurse said 'they're one size fits all'. Like fuck they are! I couldn't straighten up. I did once, but I want to have another child, so didn't again. The tearing sound I heard wasn't my nad sack being torn in half, it was the overalls. I made sure they were in a ball when I handed them back. Like what you do with the hire suit from Ferrari Fashions after someone has had a little vomit on it (make sure you hand back the coat hanger too, they charge you for that).

I was also made to wear a disposable shower cap. I washed my hair that morning, you fucks! I used to work in the meat industry, so I've worn these numbers before. It's like wearing a beret, so I always put mine on a jaunty angle. Sometimes I would wear them like a British Paratrooper. I also had to put covers on my shoes, again, just like in the meat game.

We sat outside the operating theatre for ages. We also sat in the room for ages. They tell you to get there early, like 0645 or something wrong like that. We didn't go up until 1130. I was starving, and had to do a run to the cafeteria to get something to eat. My partner was worse as she was fasting from the night before.

I didn't bring in a phone either. I thought you weren't allowed. But as the anaesthesiologist made a call to his wife (long story) as soon as Charlotte popped out, so I was shitty that I didn't bring mine in. But as I rarely call anyone, I probably wouldn't have called anyone anyway.

As the man, you get ushered out pretty quickly. They need to sew the boss up, so we are useless (again). I am OK at sewing up holes in my socks, but never tried it on a cervix or lower abdomen. Don't think I want to either. The nurse tells you it's time to go and then they put your new child in a cot and make you wheel it down to the maternity floor. I had no idea this was going to happen.

I actually walked out without my child, and had to be told to get her. I also almost walked out without giving the boss a kiss, but went back in and gave her one. Smooth, me. The shitty thing is, at least in the public sector, is that you go in the normal lift with all the other dribblers. I was at least expecting one like Gandel has at Chadstone Shopping Centre, where it is totally private and he drives right up to it, and there's security all the way too, right to his office. I've heard about this, so I don't know if it's true, but probably says more about his paranoia than anything else. But it does sound like fun.

I know the Royal Women's deals with a lot of women, and I hope some of those things they are getting treated for aren't too contagious. As there were a few in the lift with me. Some were even scraping their knuckles on the ground when they walked. And that was just the women. As it was a Caesar, we also got a private room, which was nice. No doubt if we had of had a shared room; we would have been moved to a private one before too long. That would have been my mission.

I was put in the nursery with my new daughter. I sat there with her, not knowing what to do. I was talking to her, telling her what was going on around her but that was it, as she was in the cot. A midwife came past and asked me if I wanted to hold her, and I said no one had offered me that before and I didn't know if I was allowed to do it myself. She picked her up, and gave her to me, and it was magic. She looked at me and we had about two hours together by ourselves. Her first two hours, were spent with me. We just chatted and I got to know her, and she me.

It was a pretty special time and, for me a pretty special memory.

Things I've learnt about having a child. Pt 2 & 3

2009-07-03T16:46:00.002+10:00

Part 2 Birthing sessions

We missed the birthing session, so we had a 'special session' with a mid wife who had disturbingly fat arms. I was going to suggest a pill similar to that taken by Shane Warne to get rid water retention, but was told not to. A mate told me that he sat through half of a session and then left – he said it taught him nothing. Christ, I wish I could have left halfway through. It was boring, and I felt as though it was designed for people who are a bit more lovey dovey that we are. I thought I was going to stop breathing through lack of interest – at least I was in the hospital. Also, before you go in, don't say to the old boilers what I did about having a child: I'm only here for the smacking. The looks I got could have cut a diamond.

There was a map on a poster, with three roads on it:
One was a 'normal road' which represented a 'normal' birth. This is where the woman is in pain for ages and calls her partner a cunt at ever given opportunity for what he did to her. Missed that fun.

Another road ran off the 'normal road', which was like a bumpy dirt track. This represented the problems that might arise and led either back to the 'normal road' or to the freeway, which was the Caesar route.

The rocky road leading towards the freeway was meant to represent something going on and having to go to an emergency Caesar. We didn't have to do that, as our child was breach, so there was no option.

Interesting side note: apparently in Blighty, they deliver breach children through the vaginal cavity more often than they do a Caesar. We are all wiser now.

I don't think I would have been able to handle the session with other to be parents. A mate went to one and said that people were holding hands, kissing and rubbing the mother's tummy. Christ, that's how you get into this state in the first place. Besides, we like most normal people, don't act like that all the time – maybe in the bedroom – so there's no need to do so in front of people. Especially if you're ugly.

Part 3 Language and bizarre procedures

I had never heard the term 'vaginal cavity' previously. It was quite a shock and wasn't a term that was taught to us at Caulfield Grammar School during sex ed class circa 1985. Christ it was a shock. I even said, 'ease up' to the doctor. There were other words too, but I think I've blocked them out. If we have another child, you'll find me rocking quietly in the corner, trying to block them out again.

One thing that needs explaining is that there is some swab that the mother has to do of her bum. Yes, a cotton bud and bum. You can imagine the rest. For those going through this, there is a handy diagram they provide the mother. I had to look (not at the procedure but the diagram), and fuck, I wish I didn't. I was told when it happened though. Interestingly, the lady in the diagram had a Brazilian. Total Brazilian. This was most likely done to keep men's attention. Even though it was a drawn picture, it got mine!

Further, the woman is poked and prodded often. Indeed, many times the skirt is hitched up and the undies pulled down a little. Sounds good? Not really, as it's all so clinical. Get on the table, squirt gel onto stomach, trained person rubs ultra sound device over woman's tummy, try to make out baby. I never could until she came out and I saw her in the operating room. Thankfully my partner didn't have the experience that other women have where strangers come up and want to feel her tummy. I've tried this before to a woman, and there's still a court order out on me. Fucker. Don't understand why anyone would do this to a stranger.

I know women have to do pap smears, so showing their goodies to medical professionals is nothing new to them. I can probably count on two hands how many times I've got my willy-wang out to a doctor (that includes the looks I got as a young fella when I got the chop). I've also shown it to a few lucky ladies in the past too, but now I am a dad, it doesn't happen much at all.

During the pregnancy the sisterhood converges and discuss things that men know little about. Frankly, I like to Aboriginal idea of women's business – I don't need to know. Let the sisters get together, sure they'll bag out men, but what's new in that.

Some untimely Mikey J jokes by me

2009-06-26T12:40:00.003+10:00

He died because he fell out of his oxygen tent
When the paramedics were trying to resuscitate him, they were signing 'wanna be starting something'
He couldn't bare the fact that he was finally going to tell us what mamasaymamasarmamasocsay means
It's sad that he had an addiction to prescription drugs and couldn't beat it
He'd been black, he'd been white, and decided he just couldn't live his life being a colour
I know how drugs make me feel, but he had to keep having more to feel that way
He couldn't remember the time he had his last dose, unfortunately

And of course the obligatory joke about his alleged kiddie love:

What time is it at the Neverland ranch when it's bed time?

When the big hand touches the little hand.

Things I've learnt about having a child. Pt 1

2009-06-11T20:52:00.003+10:00

I've decided to impart my knowledge of child birth to you all, as I am an expert. I'm writing up my thoughts on being a dad and having a child. I'll post them up where when I feel like it, and when I've completed them - enjoy (that's an order!).

Part 1 - It's not that hard

Some people complain about having a child. I'm a man, so it's doubtful I'll have to squeeze a watermelon out the eye of my cock (the Jap's eye, if you will), but really, with modern medicine it's a piece of piss for ladies today. We had a Caesar which wasn't that hard for me at all. And easier than a natural birth. I had to sit (one of my favourite things) and be supportive. I am fucking great at that! 20 minutes later, my daughter arrived. Easy. It's so easy, that the week before we were booked in for the Caesar, my partner went to the Royal Melbourne Show, with my parents, my sister and her son. Pregnancy can't have been too much of a drama!

There you go boys, when your missus is pregnant and complaining, about what you've done to her use that one as precedent. Say: I know a bloke on the internet whose missus went to the Royal Melbourne Show five days before she gave birth. What are you complaining about? Harden up!

Guaranteed to go down like a cup of cold sick with a pubic hair on the edge. At least you'll be remembered.

More to come.

2008 - 2009 is a year

2009-06-02T11:33:00.004+10:00

Not since I started to Blog, that's a long time ago, and it's all quality here!

No, since I left the shit PACIA and started where I am now*. It also means that in the last year the following has happened:

New job
Mortgage
Baby

Here's a photo of the little one:

There would be a few hard core people who would have this in a year, but not that many. It's all a bit weird really when I look back on it. Oh well, wouldn't change a thing - except perhaps the number of times, I've said 'would' in this post.

BTW it's my birthday tomorrow as well. Happy 39 to me. Nearly 40, time to look at a red Porsche I think.

*it's actually more than a year, as they finished me up early, which is what they should have done to the cunt Carlos Santin so he couldn't seek his revenge on the world for him being a cockhead with a rather large chip on his shoulder.
I've also since heard that Marrianne Pearce has left too. She was a divisive, know it all, incompetent, trouble maker. Truth be told she was only employed because the other applicant was shit. Second place to a simpleton. Nice work.
The good news is that there is a special dung heap in hell for the likes of her and Carlos, I hope you enjoy it. You fucking cunts. These things have a way of coming back at you, and I know that one application Carlos put in was knocked back because of his sterling reputation. Hopefully, more to come for the both of them.

I promise the next post won't be so bitter.

Border's Melbobourne Central

2009-05-06T14:39:00.003+10:00

Shit it's a long time since I last blogged. But I never said I'd be doing it every week.

I was at Borders in Melbourne Central today to buy my partner a birthday present, for it is tomorrow.

The dude says: "Do you want a bag for that?" (This is after he wanted me to sign up to their email newsletter. Like fuck I do. I get enough shit in the in box that I don't read now, so I don't need any more, twatter.)

I said yes, and then the spiel came. "It's $3.50 for a re-usable calico bag (is there another type?), or 10 cents for a plastic one".

I paused for a minute. There's no way I'm going to be seen with a fucking hippy calico bag. I may as well grow a beard, wear Birkenstocks and fuck pigeons becasue that's how popular I'll be sporting that number.

I'm all for saving the environment, and 10 cents did seem a lot to pay for a small plastic bag. I can imagine there would be a lot of professional worriers and cappuccino revolutionists who would say "10 cents is too much to pay for a plastic bag, and I want a nice world and a hug and a full sense of my own self satisfaction, so I won't pay that." So they stump up for the $3.50 or they carry their purchase.

I can understand this. And I get shitty that they offered it to me in the first place. If you want people to stop the use of plastic bags, don't offer them. It probably costs them about $10 - $20 for a box of 2500 bags as they would be ordering a lot at one time, so if they charge 10 cents, they are making some money. And the cost is meant to be a deterrent to buying. Surely if they were serious about saving the environemnt, they wouldn't contract out to get bags made in the first place.

Anyway, I paid for one, as I wasn't going to carry the books all the way back here. Arseholes. If the options were the numb-nut calico bag or nothing, I would have taken nothing and carried them. So I blame you Border's Melbourne Central for me having a plastic bag, and ultimately destroyign the planet. I hope you sleep well tonight.

Question

2009-02-17T21:33:00.002+11:00

It's got me buggered how the train from Flagstaff station to North Melbourne takes longer than the train from North Melbourne to Flagstaff in the morning.

I know I am up front on the way in (peachy keen to get to work!!), and on the way out I'm up the back, but I still can't figure it out.

I'm also thinking about getting off at West Footscray station and walking home (I walked the other night, and it took me 20 minutes or so. ), as I hate Footscray and the fuckheads that are there. Tired of being accosted by drug fucks and worried constantly about getting mugges.

Honestly, I know some people are doing it tough, but how hard is it not to pay for a train/bus ticket? I see people all the time waving random bits of paper at the bus driver, and those same people often getting pulled up by the Connex rent a cop at the stations. I hear them behind me planning their nefarious plan, which usually involves trying to spin the driver some hard luck story - spare me.

I know I'm lucky that I am not doing it that hard, but I have done, and I still managed to buy a ticket. If you're on the dole you get a concession card, but fuck me, it's $2 something for 2 hours.

And another thing, when are the powers that be stop people from paying for a ticket on the bus? Get behind some fat teenagers who are paying for a ticket with twenty cent pieces and you'll be singing my tune. If I can buy a ticket, any stupid twunter can. The sooner they stop people purchasing a ticket on line, the sooner I'll get to work. I reckon these fucks who don't prepurchase make my bus late every time, because when they aren't on it, I get to work early! Surprise, surprise!

My mate Jay and his co-presenter Chris are presenting their last show on Joy FM next Tuesday at 2100 Melbourne time. Listen in, chumps. I will be.

Charlotte is fine too, thanks for asking.

Hot

2009-01-30T15:26:00.002+11:00

It's hot here in Melbourne. We've had about four days over 45 degrees. That's over 100 in the old scale.

My garden looks to be rooted. All the plants I put look as though they are fucked. Sunrise, sunset. Still a shit. I'll water them tonight and see what happens.

My daughter is OK. She's feeling the heat but has been at my parent's place for the last two days in the a/c, so that's nice. I think we'll be getting some a/c here for next year. In the study (read: glorified bedroom with desk in corner), it is currently 40 degrees. Nice. Sweaten it up.

The cock head next door still has his computer on with the subwoofer near my head. Imagine this all night DOOOOOOO-do-do-dooo-DO-DO-DOOOO-do (repeat until you want to throttle someone). There's a special dung heap reserved in hell for this c*nt. And it's Chinese New Year this weekend (I think) so I wish him a bad new year.

I've been working from home a bit too, which is OK. I get to see a bit more of my partner and child, although only during designated break times. The two girls are great.

I caught up with my mates, James, Jason and Patty last week for some beers. That was good fun.

2009 will be the year that I blog more. And hopefully they will be interesting blogs.

Some of my old posts are proving to be gold. The one on buymac.com.au always comes up on referrals. I shoudl charge those twats for that post. They never replied to my question, meaning that they really do have some shit customer service.

This one on the songs on my iPod has constantly popped up in referrals as well. Mostly, I think it's boring fucks looking for illegal downloads - won't get any here, chumps! Might be time to update that listing as the last time I did it was on 28 March 2006. That's a lifetime ago. And the iPod in that photo shat itself and I had to buy another one. I really liked that iPod, it was old skool. But it also got a lot of use, so now mostly I use a Nano I got in Seoul.

Something else that turns up too is when freaks are looking for porn. This one was a recent search by some pervert. I have no idea where I mention 'koreanporn' but somewhere I have. I don't know if I've said this before, but someone got a referral to my blog looking for 'bumfluff perv'. I have no idea what that is, and I am only slightly interested in finding out.

My partner has been doing some searches too, as I tell her I write things about her on here, but they are always nice.

So I think I'll get a dump off the iTunes to see what CDs I have and watch the hits come in, and the disappointed searchers increase at the same time. Excellent.

Happy Xmas

2008-12-24T12:00:00.004+11:00

Yes, it's Christmas tomorrow. I want everyone to have a good one.

Its been a big year for me, new job, mortgage, and child. Action man is back!

Anyways, here are a few selected shots of my reason to be thankful.
There's heaps more at the Flickr site.

Happy Christmas, chumps!

Hooray for me

2008-12-05T17:20:00.000+11:00

I think I've used that title before.

Anyways, it been a good week. Productive at work and home has been pretty special as well. I'm surprised my last blog was the long ago, but I'm a busy man.

Patty wanted a post, so here it is.

Not much has been going on. No one has upset me too much, so that's a good thing. The fucker next door still has his subwoofer on. I bet he's playing a game. Twat. Not me - all work!

My new TC turned up. They can be a money pit. I've got to get an optical cable to run it from the TV to the A/V receiver to get some better sound happening. That's more cash. And me being tight, purchased a component cable that was 75 cms long. Stupid me. It's OK for what I want to do, but it's a drama taking stuff out now. I will replace it when I am a little more flush with cash. I get my cables from the cable chick. He is ace. Yes, he's a man.

I got the TV from Adrian here. Most helpful and he answered all my questions. I am a pain in the arse, so it was good of him to do this. The boss thinks the TV is a bit big, but I like to feel as though the people are in the room. No one complains at the cinema that the screen there is too big. She just hasn't had a chance to watch the Gilmore Girls on it. And Gossip Girl starts next week too. I'll be spending a bit more time on the computer I think.

Charlotte is well. She is in a brace now to get her hips all sorted. It's either the brace now or operations when she is one, so it's prevention for us. She is ace, and is now two months old.

We have a cleaner. That was one of the best decisions we've ever made. So happy. My weekends are mine now. Excellent.

I'm going to watch some TV.

Why are the downtrodden such arseholes?

2008-11-19T21:48:00.002+11:00

I live in a a fairly depressed area. Not really as there are more people moving in here with cash because they can't afford to buy a house anywhere else.

But there are still a lot of people around here who are still loitering at the bus stop of averageness. Figuratively and metaphorically. I have a next door neighbour who likes to talk about how she likes anal sex. Not something you hear every day, but good luck to her. I caught a glimpse of her the other day. She's doesn't have a head like a slapped arse - there will be some sick-o out there now having an belt about that.

On the bus home (strangely more so on the way home than to work), there is always a cavalcade of society's problems. Pungent stenches abound, so do drugs, and people who have less than average social skills. I am reminded of the line from Janus Two: I'm not anti-social, I'm real social, just ask my mates!

Anyway, every night there is some arsehole off their chops on the drugs waiting for the bus. Yesterday, bloke and his lady friend waiting for bus. Overheard this snippet of conversation:
She - Fuck, I've got no fucking money
Him - *drawling* just tell the driver you've lost your purse
Interestingly he was carrying a number of shopping bags.
They tried it on, and were knocked back - and like a Christmas miracle found the cash for a ticket.

Lots of people get on with out a ticket, and don't give a shit. The bus driver doesn't care, and no one else does. I buy one, I even pre-purchase to save time. Maybe I should jsut become an arsehole and not buy one.

I was sitting on the bus another time and a guy got on. He sat up the front, and pulled out a bottle of beer from his bag. He drank it like I drink a stubby. Once it was finished with, he simply threw it out the open door (the bus hadn't moved) and opened another one. What's up with that? A lot of people drink on the bus, some even try to hide in a brown paper bad, most can't be arsed. And no one gives a shit, so it's a spiral of no shit giving and silence equally agreemnet with their actions. But if you said anything to them you are likely to get knifed.

Another time, a couple got on. Sure they are afflicted with an addiction to drugs, but FFS I don't need to hear this from his lady friend: You said that if I fucked her in front of you, you'd love me more. That is a true quote. And I turned up my iPod. And looked out the window. I've seen her a few times without her man, and she is a pitiful sight. Old before her years. But she probably doesn't want my sympathy.

There is one lady who gets on the bus, when she is lucky enough to be let on, and goes into the city and begs. When they boot her out of the city, she begs near a bank. She lays on the ground with her head against a window (must be mega uncomfy) and says 'spare change'. It's not a question most of the time, but a statement.

Rudeness. They push and shove and swear when they don't get what they want. Like children. The downtrodden are also more snobby than me, now that's saying something! But they are. They abuse everyone and anyone. I don't make eye contact with anything, anymore. The people from ethnic origins are the bad ones, it's the white fellas who are the pigs. They must be banging on about how hard they are done by. I used to work in the retail meat industry, I can tell you that there are plenty of jobs going. But most of these people would rather get cash for doing noting than doing something.

That's a pretty radical statement from someone who votes Labor and believes in social justice. Oh well, the older I get the more shitty I become. There's a bloke outside Flagstaff station who sells the big issue. I don't buy it because I don't like the magazine, but he is there selling it. He's doing a great job. I sometimes see him around other places and he's trying to make a difference to his life. And he isn't an arsehole off his chops on the drugs. Or trying to be a big man by abusing someone or tagging a train.

That's enough for now.

Joy FM

2008-10-21T17:31:00.000+11:00

Tonight, I am on Joy FM.

A good mate of mine does a programme on there called Fourplay, and I am going to present four songs from Neko Case. It was hard finding four that I picked, as she is great and I like most of her stuff. There's always going to be a couple of misses, but they are mostly all hits.

My daughter is going well too. She's putting on weight which is the main thing. She has a bit of a sook up at 1800 ish, but that's not too bad. She is a funny little thing. Loves her hands out and always has them out, you can wrap her up nice and tight, and the first thing she does is wriggle her arms out.

Anyways, a quick one. Listen in to Joy.

New woman in my life

2008-10-03T09:17:00.002+10:00

Yes, I have a new woman in my life. My daughter was born yesterday at 1210ish. I was too busy keeping an eye on proceedings to look at the time.

Charlotte Annie Violet is her name. Charlotte as it's my mum's middle name and also the author of my favourite book (Jane Eyre by Charlotte Bronte), Annie because that was my partner's grandmother's middle name and Violet as that was my maternal grandmother's name. I have two middle names, so my child was always going to have the same.

The best friend of my sister in law's husband was the overseeing anesthetist during the cesarean which was nice, as it was good to have a friendly face around. He was great, particularly when I had my new dad 'moment'.

Anyway, it was a wait. Fuck, we got to the hospital at 0645 and weren't called until 1100. I was hungry, had to do a dash to get a salad sarnie from downstairs, and also the car. to get stuff. There was another cesear before us and we were no. 2. On my Flickr site, there are photos of her birth, and one in where she was nice and fresh, which isn't the best shot in the world, but it's up there now.

The rest of yesterday was spent sitting around and meeting the new child. I got to spend about an hour with her when my partner was coming out of surgery, so we had a good chat. She is a good kid, and bound to give me plenty of grief in the coming years. Oh yeah, I am really looking forward to her going out with boys - that's going to be great!

Special shout out to my good mate Phil in Seoul. I appreciate the phone call mate. Meant a lot to me. Good luck with the new job mate, hope you land it, then we can come and visit in China!

Had to have a go at the dudes next door again last night. Hopeless fuckers. How many times do you need to be told don't park somewhere before it finally sinks in? Useless. But as the payout took place this morning after 0100, they now know that I am likely to give them a burst anytime they do it, day, night or even early morning. Time to get onto the body corporate again.

I'm off to do a quick spot of gardening now and then back to the hospital.

Here's the new child:

Nice double chin too!

Big day

2008-10-01T20:50:00.000+10:00

Tomorrow is a big day.

My partner and I are going to be parents tomorrow. I will be a dad, and she a mum.

It's a bit strange, knowing that this time tomorrow night, there will be another being relying on me for food etc.

I'm up for it though! I know that it is a girl and I am looking forward to meeting her. I am also looking forward to saying those famous dad lines: 'Don't tell your mother'.

Hopefully the operation goes well and I will see about putting some photos up too. I have some other photos of my car on various roads and my trip to Flinders Island, but I think the photos of the baby might take priority.

I also made some purchases when my tax hit my account. I have a new screen, it's a ball biter and means that I am not looking at the tiny one that comes on my work computer.

The Z-10 Interactive Speaker System now grace my desk as well. I didn't pay nearly $300 for them either. The bonus with these is that they are USB and don't plug into the headphone jack. That sold it for me. I could have got cheaper ones, but I hate too may wires, so the USB speakers go into a hub and work fine from there.

I went a bit Logitech mad, and also go the Harmony 1000i Advanced Universal Remote. I used to have about 5 remotes on the coffee table, and the boss was always paying out on me because of it. Not now, there is one! It is very easy to use, want to watch TV, press one button and it turns on the amp, TV - swaps it to AV, turns on the Foxtel box and turns on the video (chanel seven comes through that). Easy, and to turn it off push one button also. Set up was good, but you do need to know how your system is set up, once you know that it's easy.

That's all. I was goign to do some work but our content management system has booted me out and won't let me back in, so it's off to bed, as we have to be in at the hospital at 0645 tomorrow morning.

Post more later.

Lazy me

2008-09-05T16:38:00.000+10:00

Fuck, it's been since 11 July since I updated. Whoops. I'm sorry to my loyal reader for being lazy. But what can I say.

I haev an internet connection at home now, so I might blog some more. Also I have a new home. West Footscray is the place for me! It's good. Nice place, the missus likes it, and I have a garage to while away the hours.

Special shout out to James for helping set up the wireless connection - Hoo-ray for you James, you're fucking great! And not a cunter.

Anyways, it's been like this: get up, work, come home. That's about. Those fuckers at Foxtel made my life difficult, but not any more. All sorted.

Not much else going on. My car is still ace, like me. Off to the footy this weekend. Better send off an email.

Went up to see my Aunty on the weekend. Let's just say the Mondeo went on more dirt than it every has before.

The missus is now 36 weeks pregnant. Baby due soon. Name all sorted. We had to do a sneaky trip to a place in central Victoria to sort one of the names. All you need to know is that my child will have three names like I do. Very regal

I am going to go home. Had enough, and I am off drinkin' tonight. Probably the last time I'll be able to get on it for a number of months. And this time next year, I'll be a father, so will be able to partake in father's day. Woo-hooo!

Time to update

2008-07-11T16:32:00.000+10:00

I've been busy. Working, man. So I haven't updated as much as possible.

I am still getting the normal amount of freaks looking for porn on this site - more fool them!

I've also got an issue (one of many) with my computer. My virus protection is about to run out and I have no idea where to get another one from. So I'm downloading a freebie, I'm sure someone out there will help me.

Anyways, another long week almost over. Next week we move into our new house! Hoo-ra! Looking forward to it. Nice to be out of Hawthorn, but I'm not looking forward to the trip in on the train. Fuck it, I'll be right.

So, I've been thinking and I've got a list of 'Rules To Live By'. They are in no particular order, except hte way I wrote them. Enjoy and try to live your life by them.

Clean your car, and don't leave rubbish inside it
Don’t walk around smiling – you look like an idiot.
Walk with a sense of purpose
Steaks should be cooked no more than medium rare, unless you are pregnant or an idiot
Don’t sit and read in the toilets at work
Put your dishes in their proper place once you’ve finished
When you’ve eaten put your knife and fork together
Use deodorant, and even after shave
Buy clothes that fit and are flattering to you – cheapest isn’t always the best way to go
Buy a newer car, the difference in economy will add up, so too will safety features
Offer a woman or an old timer a seat on busy public transport – don’t get up too soon though, otherwise some other man will take the seat
Open doors for a lady
Carry on when you’re young, because you look stupid doing it in later life
Buy clothes that are suitable to your age – nothing is worse than people trying to look younger
Put things away
If you’re a man and going bald, shave it off
Say ‘thank you’ when someone does something for you
Respect your elders
Call your parents once a week, at least
Become involved in a community organisation
Give your partner a compliment at least once a day
Get an interest outside of home
Be nice to receptionists
Go out with someone who is smarter than you
Always ensure that you earn enough to pay your rent – someone might walk out on you
When you’re younger, put it out there a bit more
Don’t hold grudges, forgive, but never forget
Try to minimise the amount of time you spend talking on the mobile phone when on public transport
Invite friends over for a feed
Catch up with friends and don’t forget birthdays
Keep a blog, if for no other reason than to amuse you
Get to know your neighbours
Eat less fat
Walk more
Always wash your hands when you leave the toilet, with soap
Lay in the grass on a hot day
The back (end) of your trouser leg should just touch the heel of your shoe
Buy a pet
Take a trip to the country
Get your teeth fixed
Put a whimsical tune on as your ring tone
Be nice to your IT guys
Talk to old people, they have a lot of wisdom. And some interesting views on today
Try a new kind of dish next time you go out for a feed
Go with your partner to a film they want to see
Make the bed in the morning
Use the toilet brush
Clean and polish your shoes – those little dots on the front of a man’s shoe are usually urine splashes
Write a letter
Wash your hair when it needs it
Buy your partner some music
Buy your partner some flowers
Don’t have any more than four servings of carbohydrates in one meal
Iron your clothes
Drink more water
Remember that when you’re in a shout it’s about you buying a drink for someone else
Follow a football team
Be passionate about something
Don’t feel obligated to sleep with someone on the first or tenth date
Be wary of get rich quick schemes – if it sounds too good to be true, then it probably is
Buy the best things you can afford and save up to get worthwhile items
Your tie should just touch the top of your belt buckle
When you put on a top, roll it up so you don’t get deodorant stains on the outside
Cook sausages slowly, over a low heat
Don’t put cloves into a ham when you are glazing it
Try not to take advantage of people
Treat people the way you would want to be treated
Be free with your love – as the song goes
Get to know your local butcher
Have the courage of your convictions
Don’t wear button down collars with a suit
Pick your fights
If you are in a fight, hit first and hit hard
Join a sporting club
Remember that the further the monkey climbs up the tree the bigger its arse gets.

Hooray for me

2008-06-13T16:39:00.000+10:00

Why? Because I can.

I have started my new job. I'll be happier when pay hits my account, but that's not too far away. This computer doesn't have the spell check on for words in the internet, so if I mis-sepll words, don't hate me.

I had some time off too. It was fucken lovely. I did fuck all. I lie, I went to Flinders Island to help my sister. I'm not used to living without luxuries. You may say I'm weak, but I like showering and electricity. It was OK. I've meant to post some photos, but as I've said many times here, I am lazy. Note the number of posts lately for further proof of this.

It was good to leave the old place. They were hopeless. Must be a shock having three people resign in a week. But if you're head is up your fucken arse, you probably wouldn't notice. Numpties. What a strange place. When I am a little older I'll write about it. Some highlights will be:

baseless, and unproven, allegation against me made by a work matewho was only out to better herself and shaft everyone else at all time (she told me this)
never getting clarification of work and roles, despite asking for this numerous times
never getting work back after preseting it for review (longest wait was 5 months)
only getting praised for good work in performance reviews i.e. once a year (this is what I was told)
laughing at a funny document and then having my professional judgement questioned becasue I thought it was light hearted (I didn't agree with this)
having to grog on with the boss and their amazingly stupid and boring ex-workmates while interstate - yawn-a-rama
the need to tell everyone in the office of your everyday movements (not bowel)
the absolute inability of some people there to take a joke and spend even 5 minutes laughing at themselves

Ah, fuck them all, I say. Anyways, we have all left now who resigned in the same week. We have had a number of drinks, and I am meeting up with one of them tonight to continue the fun.

Megan, are you happy now?

Wonder years

2008-05-08T15:31:00.000+10:00

I posted a post here a while back about the Wonder Years. And what do you know, some numpty has done s search and ended up here looking for it. Silly fucker.

Anyways, while I clicked to see where they came from I came across this video:

They both grew up before our eyes. Pity Kevin turned into some sort of strange looking dude. Winny was on the West Wing for a while, and she has grown into a fine example of womanhood. Like Hermione.

Another quiz, about my favourite person - Me.

2008-05-07T14:26:00.001+10:00

A quiz I knocked off from another website. Enjoy... yawn.

01. Do you like blue cheese? Yes. Yes I do.

02. Have you ever smoked heroin? Not on your nelly.

03. Do you own a gun? No. Dad does.

04. What flavour do you add to your drink at sonic? What the fuck is 'sonic'? If it is a place why hasn't it got a capital 'S'?

05. Do you get nervous before Doctor Appointments? Nope, just bored in the waiting room.

06. What do you think of hot dogs? Lips and bum mashed and squeezed by pressure into a collagen skin – what's not to like?

07. Favourite Christmas movie? Elf, but 'The Snowman' is up there too.

08. What do you prefer to drink in the morning? A nice cup of tea.

09. Can you do push ups? I can, but I choose not to.

10. Age? 37 and, oddly I get older each year.

11. What’s your favourite piece of jewellery? Probably my watch. Not into jewellery on men, if you are, go right ahead.

12. Favourite hobby? Bagging out St Kilda for their shit efforts. Cynicism.

13. Favourite Actor? Haven't really got on, but John Wayne in 'The Searchers' was pretty poignant, especially the last scene which pays homage to Harry Cary Senior.

14. Do you have A.D.D.? Who knows? Can I do a test on the internet?

15. What’s one trait you hate about yourself? Probably the fact that I am a picky bastard.

16. Middle name? Two – William and Gordon (maternal grandfather's first name, paternal grandfather's middle name)

17. Name 3 thoughts at this exact moment:

1. This quiz is long.
2. I should ring that personal trainer.
3. Do I need to go to the toilet?

18. Name 3 things you bought yesterday? I was a little hung over (thank you Jarrod) so they were:

1. One Coke Zero
2. Another Coke Zero
3. A dim sim and a potato cake (that's two, but thanks James for the walk up)

19. Name 3 drinks you regularly drink?
1. Water
2. Beer
3. Tea

20. Current worry? Taking on a new job and mortgage and child. There's a few, anyone want one?

21. Current hate right now? A numpty at work – he knows who he is. Fucker.

22 Favourite place to be? Not at work. Yeah, and with the missus. Sorry, with the radio on, preferably playing some Richard Hawley or Sam Baker.

23. How did you bring in the New Year? Went into the fireworks with my nephews and sister in law, back home by 11:45, watched the fireworks on TV, while having a Slurpee with Vodka in it. REBELS.

24. Where would you like to go? Somewhere but here. I.e. not at work.

25. Name three people who will complete this? I knocked it off a website, so feel free to do the same.

26. Do you own slippers? Ugg boots here. .

27. What shirt are you wearing? A business one. As I professionalism personified.

28. Do you like sleeping on satin sheets? Not for me. It's 400 thread count or nothing!

29. Can you whistle? Yep, and while I work.

30. Favourite colour? Cobalt Blue

31. Would you be a pirate? Raping doesn't interest me. Pillaging does.

32. What songs do you sing in the shower? Too busy washing.

33. Favourite girl’s name? Don't have one.

34. Favourite boy’s name? Don't have one.

35. What is in your pocket right now? Coins, and a hanky.

36. Last thing that made you laugh? Something James wrote on MSM, about inflating the human. He, he, he.

37. Best bed sheets as a child? Clean ones.

38. Worst injury you’ve ever had? I've got rooted hips, knees from a car accident, so that will do.

39. Do you love where you live? We'll be moving soon, so I will learn to love that area too.

40. How many TVs do you have in your house? 2, one works the other isn't plugged in.

41. Who is your loudest friend? Dave Petersen - Mangina

42. How many dogs do you have? Don't have one, at the moment.

43. Does someone have a crush on you? Some sicko would. Time for an intervention order.

44. What is your favourite book? The Year of the Death of Richardo Reis by Jose Saramago, or Johnny Cash's biography – Cash by Cash.

45. Where were you born? A hospital in Thomastown. It was a happy day. At least for me.

46. What is your favourite candy? Don't really eat too much of it.

47. Favourite Sports Team? St Kilda Football Club

48. What song do you want played at your funeral? Not a song, but the CD by Johnny Cash - 'My Mother's HymmBook'. And as for a song 'Pilgrim' by Steve Earle and the Del McClury Band off the CD 'The Mountain'.

49. What were you doing 12 AM last night? Sleeping.

50. What was the first thing you thought of when you woke up? Better send a text message to the missus, on account of her birthday today.

Smart cookies

2008-05-02T16:18:00.000+10:00

I work with a lot of smart people.

I am not a dickhead (at least I don't think so), but fuck me, there are some big brains here. I've got a few degrees, well three. And people here have less than me, but show me up as a numb nut at the best of times.

I have a brain full of useless crap. That's what I've decided, and dammit if I am wrong! I know a lot about stuff that is of little or no good to people. I can quote a couple of Bible verses and some other random literature, but that's about.

Oh well. Everyone has their niche I suppose. Mine is usually inappropriate toilet jokes or jokes about the toilet parts. Everyone likes a good cock joke, and more like a good fart joke. And as for one that allows me to mention alternative names for male ejaculation (man milk, pre-cum, dick snot and the latest - knuckle children) I'm all for it.

The difficulty is finding 'the right time'. Here there is very little of that. So I laugh to myself, often. If you stick your head out around here, it's likely to be noticed, so best to keep to yourself. Some of the smart cookies don't have the same low brow humour that I do.

That's the world I inhabit anyways. Good luck to me.

BTW, it seems that a mate here has set up her own Blog. Makes me feel proud. Anyway here is the link. I think there is fuck all up there at the moment, but hopefully it becomes as interesting and as world changing as this blog. read it and enjoy.

More to come. When I can be fucked, so it won't be today, fucker.

Stuff going on

2008-04-24T09:22:00.000+10:00

I have some stuff going on in my life at the moment, and that's the reason for my no writes here for a while.

I said many times that I am lazy, and my non posts should attest to that statement. However, this time there are a number of reasons.

1. My partner is pregnant. Pretty big news. Unexpected, but not unwanted. Due in October, so it was a January conception. January here in Australia is usually warm, so it must have been a celebration of something. Anyways, I am pretty happy and even a little excited. I'm not getting any younger, and this is a good time for this to happen. WE've had all the checks and everything seems to be going OK. It is an expensive thing, but the spending has started now and probably won't stop for at least another 18 years, goody.

2. We have purchased a new house. As the child will require shelter, we have finally purchased a pad. It is in West Footscray, in the west of Melbourne. A bit of a shock for me, as I've always lived in the leafy inner south east suburbs, where people were conservative and the local members were too. I've never lived in a safe Labor Seat. Will be good not having to hunt out the bloke handing out the ALP how to vote card. It's a three bedroom townhouse type place, which a double garage. So it is really more garage than house. It too is good. We have signed the deposit forms, and paid the 10%, so once settlement comes on in June, I will be a westy.

3. Grief at work. There is a bit of grief going on here. I don't like writing about work here, as I see a separation. But let me assure you, it is not a very happy place and I am not very happy here. Steps will be taken to see this end. Hopefully shortly.

4. I also purchased some CDs a while back. Again, they came from my CD store of choice, www.cduniverse.com. The CDs listed below cost me $153 in US including postage. I'd be lucky to get them here for less than $200. That's why I buy from the US. Those purchased were:

If I could only remember my name – David Crosby (excellent and Mojo's reissue of 2007)
Sound of Silver – LCD Sound System (great faced paced beats – another Mojo 2007 winner)
Neon Bible – Arcade Fire (Mojo's Top of 2007, and it's easy to see why)
The Jarvis Cocker Record – Jarvis Cocker(wanted this for a while, can't get it here, ace record)
Mirrored – Battles (Another Mojo 2007 winner, good choice people!)
Cavalier – Tom Brosseau (occasionally you're going to miss, I think this is one of those times)
Mescalito – Ryan Bingham (Americana, and worth it from a young Texas songwriter)
Chrome Dreams II – Neil Young (Keeping it going, and for good reason)
In Rainbows – Radiohead (yet another 2007 Mojo winner. And my first Radiohead CD, was a bit sceptical, but now a convert – fanfuckingtastic).

I am planning on buying some more CDs soon too, as it has been two months since my last lot. Fuck, better get into it.

5. My car. I purchased a new car in October last year, and it was delivered in January. Because I am a picky bastard, there have been a few issues with it. There still are. And it will be going back to the dealer again soon to get the locking set to go on once I drive off, to get the 'a' pillar replaced and for them to fix the grinding noise in the sunroof. I do however, like the car. I've enjoyed driving it and getting to know it. The UK based Mondeo Forum has been very helpful, and so too has the Australian Ford Forum. I read a lot about this car before it was released and am very happy with the info I've picked up from both these sites. It's just a pity that the dealer I'm dealing with doesn't read it otherwise they wouldn't told me that the driver's door can't be set to unlock only. All I had to do was hold down both the lock and unlock on the key fob. FUCKERS! Sorted now. They will be getting a bit of a rev up too when it needs to go back in. The dealer will also be pointed in the direction of the pommy site for info on how to set the locks. I shouldn't have to do it, but will. Here is picture of my car getting its very first tank of Diesel.

So there has been a lot going on. Stay tuned for more. The best news about the house is that my partner and I had an agreement, once we got our own place, we could get a cleaner. When June comes around, that will be the end of cleaning for me.

Thank FUCK! I hate cleaning.

I bet you want to see a cleaner in a French Maid's outfit. I may not want to not see that. But I am a realist; it will be some flabby Eastern European. In a head scarf. Thank God I won't be there when the cleaning is to be done. We have a birthday dinner for my mate Garry this weekend, so that will be good, and I am looking forward to it already. We are also going to be neighbours of Garry and Jay, so that will be good too. All good, just like me.

Gold

2008-03-27T16:05:00.000+11:00

Not the Spandau Ballet song (although that is a great track), but this clip featuring Steve Colbert.

It's been taken off YouTube, but it's still here!

An email chain letter

2008-03-20T09:21:00.000+11:00

This came into my hotmail in box. I sent it back to people I don't really know.

You.

Can.

Only.

Type.

One.

Word.

Not as easy as you might think. Change the answers to suit you and then pass it on and return to me as well.

Remember: one word answers.

1. Where is your cell phone? desk

2. Your significant other? sleeping

3. Your hair? receding

4. Your mother? Yo!

5. Your father? Curmudgeon

6. Your favourite thing? life

7. Your dream last night? drunken

8. Your favourite drink? Crownies

9. Your dream/goal? improve

10. The room you're in? colleagues

11. Your ex? snakewoman

12. Your fear? unfounded

13. Where do you want to be in 6 years? improving

14. Where were you last night? meeting

15. What you're not? dim

16. Muffins? english

17. One of your wish list items? Huh?

18. Where you grew up? here

19. The last thing you did? type

20. What are you wearing? clothes

21. Your TV? home

22. Your pets? nope

23. Your computer? breaking

24. Your life? living

25. Your mood? dyspeptic

26. Missing someone? yep

27. Your car? service

28. Something you're not wearing? cravat

29. Favourite store? liquour

30. Your summer? Where? home

31. Like someone? most

32. Your favourite colour? blueish

33. When is the last time you laughed? today

34. Last time you cried? secret

35. Who will/would re-post this? people

A toaster

2008-03-12T16:45:00.005+11:00

I have a toaster at home, it is a Breville Icon. (According the Breville website it is $80. Target in Camberwell sells them for less than that.)

It is a swish looking unit. But it is a fucker. Why? Because it is hard to get the toast just right. If I toast bread at 3 it turns out too white, like my legs, but if I turn it to six, it doesn't get less white and more brown, it gets black.

Fuck. Why when I double the setting it doesn't it double the colour? Some other fucked arbitrary decision by the stupid fuck of a toaster is made, that results in a smoky kitchen and a payout from my missus? It's a shit.

Then the smoke alarm goes off, and fuck, what a disaster.

So I am left to toast my morning bread at a lower setting more often. And that takes time, and pisses me off, as there is a set way of doing things in the morning.

For me it goes like this:

Alarm goes off
Sit of edge of bed for about 2.5 minutes trying to move
Turn radio off alarm onto radio
Go to toilet
Wash hands – turn on heater in bathroom
Fill up kettle, because SOMEONE never does it at night
Have shave
Have shower
Dry
Turn on Sunrise
Pour cup of tea for me, set HRH's up for later
Have muesli
Take vitamin tablets
Have toast/drink cup of tea
Make cup of tea for HRH
Put dishes in dishwasher
Clean teeth
Get dressed
Get to work

(Another interesting fact is that I have been having my morning cup of tea out of the same cup for at least 10 years, and I used it every day when I was at school too from 1989 to 1992 too. Who says I have a OCD?)

I need a routine. And the above does me. Out the door by 0730 most days. Up at 0615, I'm like a fucking clock!

More freaks have been looking at my site to. Another one typed in "Korean porn pictures. " This person was from the Philippines. I would have thought there was plenty of opportunities to get some over there (at least that's what I've been told), without looking on my blog for Korean Porn.

I was in Seoul in October 2004, and I was propositioned by a Korean prostitute while I was waiting for a cab in Itaewon. I assumed she was, although I could have been wrong, perhaps she was looking for directions. I never found out, as I don't speak Korean, and was to drunk to learn. Anyway, all I said to her was: Not tonight, bit tired. She was still hanging around looking for male companionship when I left in my cab. Sunrise, sunset.

I listen to Joy FM a lot. Lindy Burns shits me, so it's Joy or nothing. My mate Jay is presenting a show on Saturday morning with Chris called 'Four Play'. I would advise you all to listen to it. It is a good show, and I enjoy it. Rumour has it I might even get a shout out thi Saturday morning - excellent. Last time this happened the song that accompanied the shout out was 1, 2, 3, 4 by Steps. Magic.

I will have some news to announce soon, so make sure you return.

Disturbing

2008-02-22T11:24:00.000+11:00

Most know that I monitor who looks at this blog. There is a site meter thingo at the bottom which is where I see how popular I am with everyone. And the word is, that I am not. Stiff shit. To me.

There have been over 700 visitors to this site. I pity most of them. However, when I was checking up to see who has been on, this was one.

Who the fuck does a search on blogspot for 'masturbation OR masterbate'? A sick fuck that's who. Christ everyone knows that there is no touch like your own, but for fuck sake, keep it in the bedroom (or on the couch, study or where ever it is more comfy for you).

Again, it seems as though my blog has been bumped off and replaced by other perverted fucks talking about having a belt. The person who did this search was from the US. And they entered at the stupid rant about St Valentine's day too. I did mention bashing the bishop there, but only briefly. Surely they didn't read it, as they were gone in less than a second.

If you want at look at people having a flog go to thehun.net. There's heaps on there. This is a blog that is free of perversion, you sick turd!

I've got some more CDs coming through next week (hopefully), and I'll put the names up when they get here.

That's it.

Thoughts on love and St Valentine's Day

2008-02-13T17:41:00.001+11:00

When I was a younger bloke, I had some periods of dryness. Not the kind that causes itching and condescending looks from the chemist when you ask for ointment, but from the lack of female companionship. Now it was not a feeling I was unused to, having been to an all boy's school from 12 until 18. Although there was a bit of latent homosexuality (good natured, of course), mostly I can remember high school by the amount of intimidation and threats that I had to deal with. And this was just from the teachers. Later still, I started drinking and found that women were not attracted by the public bar at the old Racecourse Hotel in Caulfield East, or the other bit sleazy dives I used to inhabit all too often.

So there was a time when I went friendless. It was also increased by the fact that I was studying and living at home with the parents. That wasn't a nice time for me.

As indicated without a female companion, it was always a balancing act between masturbation and tears. Every single person knows this but some deny it exists. I knew of people who would combine the two by masturbating in a pool of their own tears. Not me. Just get through it I did.

There was also a bit of resentment. We all have our hard luck stories, some more harder lucker than others. Breaking up is never easy to do, as the song goes. So it is necessary to choose between nice and nasty. Everyone does nice, or says they do, not me. I am Mr Nasty. When I break up with a partner it stays broken. No chance of reconciliation there. Another reason for my dry patches.

Resentment comes in many forms. Often highlighted by St Valentine's Day, but not exclusively. I know someone who refused to go to Ikea, as the couples walking made him resentful, and also bitter. I once asked a friend who had recently broken up with his partner if he was going to "stay home like a sad bastard and drink from the bitter cup of resentment". I thought it was a funny throwaway line, but he said "yes". There was no come back.

My brother wrote a song about a break up with a girl and called it "Bitter Cup". I had a go at him when I saw that there was no dedication to me, as the song is about the bitter cup of resentment, and I used it often to describe his many sad bastard nights at home. He told me to: "Fuck off!".

One time a partner gave me for St Valentine's Day a pair of glow in the dark boxer shorts. (It's important to remember that this was the early 90s.) They said 'No' in the light and when the light went off; they would glow and say 'Yes'. However, most times they (and her) said 'No' regardless of the light. Her father was a drunkard who once attempted to strike me in the head with a pick-axe as I didn't want to do what he wanted me to do. I would go there to pick her up at 1030 on a Sunday morning, after they , as a family, had been to church together (Lutheran too – says a lot), and he would have already emptied a bottle of McWilliams Sweet Sherry and be onto his second. Obviously, there were a number of interrelated issues. Eventually, she moved into a house full of self absorbed, Nietzsche reading, Claret drinking, vegetarian fuck heads, and that was the end of that little misadventure. The only memory I have of the fuck heads is that one of them was an ugly woman (not from looks but attitude) with a deformed hand.

Another mate of mine was in a relationship with a lass whom he really liked. It ended badly and there were a lot of recriminations of both sides, and not just limited to them. He was very upset and the negative feelings were hard to shift for some time. He is still probably a little disturbed by the goings on, and recently saw her. She was happily married, living in a wealthy suburb, with a goodly number of children. I think that might have settled his issues but I don't know, and I am unlikely to ask, as I am a man.

I have been in a relationship for over 10 years now. When blokes get into relationships, they think it's always going to be g-strings, revelling bras and on tap sex. How wrong we are.

All to soon the Target cotton panties, hum drum everyday bra and the soft on inducing flannelette pyjamas become the clothing of choice except for birthdays (sometimes) or other 'special' occasions (for example: weddings, christenings, AFL Grand Finals, Manpower reunions, Summer Nats, and/or holidays to name a few). The honey moon lasts a while, but the everyday hits home pretty fucking fast for both parties when your partner walks in on you cutting your toenails on the bed in your underpants. Then it farting in the open, jokes about crusty undies, and unkind jokes about the mangina on a cold winter's morning.

It's time for me to do something else. Simple runs to live by: women like flowers, men like beer and kids like cartoons. Easy.

Weekend

2008-01-29T16:27:00.000+11:00

It was a long weekend here in Australia. One of the few secular holidays we get together as a country.

Some choose to belt people up, and get into fights with police on Australia Day. Not me, I prefer the more gentler pursuits.

So my partner and I headed up to Mansfield to stay at a cottage. We left on Friday night, and got up there later on. It was the third time we've been there, too.

Many years ago, I was offered a job by the owners of the big supermarket up there. I didn't take it, as they weren't going to pay enough, but shit, it would have been different. One of the main reasons for not doing so, was that the owners wife was an American.

I've got American friends, and they are in America. Just where I like them. She was a little pushy, and if I was to make the move up there, I would have to bite my tongue a bit, and I probably couldn't have done that. So there I would have been, sacked for telling someone to get fucked, and in Mansfield with no job. Not good.

So I decided against it.

We were in Mansfield for a while. I drank too much, having knocked off a slag of Crown Lager in the time up there, so that's not good. But it does go to prove my theory that Crownies don't give you a hangover. I drank 10 in one sitting, and although I was a little hazy, I didn't feel as though someone had shat in my mouth, and hit me with a floor board.

We relaxed, which was what we needed. There are two cabins where we are, and the couple next door were rarely sighted. (Being the friendly person I am, I wanted to invite them over for a beer, but I wasn't allowed.) We on the other hand, were quite comfortable sitting in the hammock chairs for a goodly part of the weekend.

As I've written here before, I have a portable radio that has clocked up about 100,000 kilometres, as I used to take it everywhere when I drove. I have also taken it to most places in Australia with me, and also to Seoul last year. There is nothing worse for me, than being in a hotel, where the only music available is through the TV – that really shits me.

So I took it with me. We listened to some Sam Baker and Richard Hawley on Friday night, some Billy Bragg, Steve Earle and a mixture of songs on Saturday night, and then on Sunday morning used it to listen to the cavalcade of whimsy that comes out of Mansfield FM. Shirley J won all the competitions for your info. Lots of country on that station, and not the cool country, but big hat country.

I went to the butchers and got meat for a BBQ on the Sunday night, which was really decent meat, as it was country meat. We went to the local Chinese restaurant (Ying Ging!) on Saturday night, and it was shithouse. Yuk. The food came in metal bowls, and no plates were offered, so you had to eat out of the bowls – how common. I've had a lot of things in my mouth over my life, and of the things that you would want to swallow, that meal wasn't one.

My partner was leaving a tip ($5) and I cracked it and said it wasn't worth a $5 tip, to which I was told to shut up, and 'let's just get out'. Fair enough.

So we relaxed, took a trip to Eildon (the lake is up from the last time I was up there in December/January 06-07), to Jameson (nice pale ale at the brewery), and fuck all else. I almost finished my book, and was going to start on my Mojo magazine, but didn't get the time. I was relaxed, and didn't get the time to fit anything else in, as I was booked up.

Having said all that, I thoroughly enjoyed myself.

Facts about me

2008-01-25T11:37:00.000+11:00

I've said on many occastions that I am lazy, and seeing that my last post was on 21 December 2008, seems like it's true.

So to keep the few dodgy readers I have, I've produced a bumper post! In reality I knocked it off someone else's website, but it does the job. Here are some facts about me. Enjoy.

[1.] Where was the first time you ever kissed the last person you kissed?
Charlton's and probably this morning.

[2.] What’s the greatest thing that happened to you today?
As I say, everyday above ground is a good day

[3.] What’s the number one thing that turns you on the most?
Air

[4.] Would you rather get up early or sleep in?
I like getting up, who knows what the new day will bring. In my case, mostly idiots

[5.] Tell me where you got each article of clothing you’re wearing?
Most of them from David Jones, except the boots which I got from RM Williams

[6.] What’s the closest thing to you that is brown?
Eyes

[7.] What would you change about your life right now?
Level of job satisfaction

[8.] Would you rather smile over a lie or cry over the truth?
Truth

[9.] What’s on your bedroom floor right now?
I'm not there, but I'll say books and magazines (not rude ones)

[10.] Who was the last person you got into an argument with?
I let it go, although there were some words last night with my partner

[11.] Do you trust people?
Yep, probably shouldn't

[12.] If you could move away, no questions asked, where would you move?
I'd have to go with the missus, and New Zealand – South Island or somewhere on the Victorian coast – Lorne, Apollo Bay.

[13.] Have you ever been out of the country?
Yep, although not as often as I'd like.

[14.] Could you go a day without eating?
Be an issue for me

[15.] How much do looks matter to you?
I'm no oil painting, so I don't like to judge.

[17.] When was the last time you had your hair cut?
I need one soon, and it would have been a good few weeks back, probably December.

[18.] Would you rather be mad or sad?
Sad. Madness is too energy striping.

[19.] Does it take a lot to make you cry?
Not really, although it is normally over something sad – surprising that.

[20.] What’s the best feeling in the world?
Breathing.

[22.] Are your parents strict?
Mum was, and still is. That's why I don't live there anymore.

[23.] Do you tell your parents everything?
Nope, don't want to worry them. We are a family of worriers.

[24.] Would you rather be a bird or a fish?
Bird, it would be cool to fly.

[25.] Name fears you have...
Spiders, aborted landings on planes, idiots

[26.] If you need to go to the store a block away, do you walk or drive?
Probably walk. But it depends on how much and what sort of shit I have to cart back

[27.] Does the thought of marriage scare you?
Been in a relationship for over 10 yrs, so I get nagged like I'm married.

[28.] How many kids do you want?
Never thought about it.

[29.] What’s your favourite colour to wear?
I'll wear any colour.

[30.] Who was the last person in your bedroom besides you?
My partner

[31.] What are you doing tonight?
Driving to Mansfield for the weekend.

[32.] Would you rather be rich & sad or poor & happy?
Been poor and happy, so I'd like to try the alternative.

[34.] What would you do if you found a dragon egg?
Let it hatch and use the dragon on my enemies.

[35.] Do you get bored easily?
Yep. Like now.

[36.] What’s something that someone can do that really bothers you?
Not pay back money.

[37.] Did you ever want to change your name when you were younger?
Yep, to John. Got me fucked why.

[38.] Do you wish you were famous?
No.

[39.] Do you make a wish at 11:11?
Why haven't I been told about this before?

[40.] When you’re at the beach, do you swim or lay out more?
Not really a beachy person.

[41.] Who’s the last text message you received from and what did it say?
Got one from the Post Office telling me there is something in my Post Office Box – goody!

[42.] What are you freakishly obsessed with?
Radios and watches.

[44.] Do you like going to the mall to shop or just shopping online?
On line.

[45.] Can music effect your mood?
I think so.

[46.] What piercings do you want?
Not me

[47.] What tattoos do you want?
Might get another on the other arm now, thinking about a hibiscus flower and some other tiki themes.

[48.] Have you ever been in a cave?
Yes.

[49] Have you ever eaten a bug?
Probably.

[50.] Are you holding back telling someone how you really feel about them?
At work, one always has to me more 'diplomatic', so yes.

Xmas

2007-12-21T10:05:00.000+11:00

It's nearly Xmas. Joy. I know I haven't been filling this in as diligently as I should, but I a lazy.

Anyway, I will do so in the future.

I have a new tattoo, this is it below. It hasn't been finished yet, and I expect at least another 2 sittings, including one tonight.
That was a little painful, and tonights should be much the same.

I have also purchased a new car. It isn't here yet, but should be in the early new year. Or over the break between Xmas and New Year. It is a diesel Mondeo. I have one at the moment and it is a beauty. Really impressed and can't wait until mine turns up.

I might even post some photos.

I have also purchased some new CDs. They haven't arrived yet, but they are:

Sam Baker	'Pretty World'
Rocky Burnette	'Wampus Cat'
Levon Helm	'Dirt Farmers'
Led Zeppelin	'Mothership'
Bruce Springsteen	'Magic'
Steve Earle	'Washington Square Serenade'

I got these from here. Again, incredibly cheap, and they look all right. I ordered them last week, so they should be here over the break. All for less than $130 Australian, delivered. I know, I could find cheaper versions here, but I can't be fucked.

I also purchased two shirts from here. They are western style shirts, so hard to get here, but cheap. Again, two shirts into Australia in less that 5 working days for under $80. Can't be beaten.

Better go. Later dude.

Lazy

2007-11-14T18:16:00.000+11:00

My Internet connection is a bit dodgy. Oh well.

I have started my new job. It's good. Will be busy, so that's good. On the whole, most people seem OK. As with all places, there are always a few twunts.

I have also put in an order for a new car, as I left the last one with the last job. So I am committed at my new place for three years at least. Look out them!

Anyways, it seems OK, time will tell.

I have been buying some CDs. I got them from here. It is way cheaper than buying them here in OZ, especially since the Aus dollar is up about 90 cents.

So I went opn a bit of a spending spree. As normal, Mojo Magazine was my guide. No CDs I buy are less than three or four stars.

Here they are:
Brad Paisley '5th Gear' - good country rock
Interpol 'Our Love to Admire' - good CD, enjoying it
Dave Olney 'One Tough Town' - alt country good stuff
Aqualung 'Memory Man' - good stuff pommy alternative
Pinback 'Autumn of the Seraphs' - sounds pompous but it isn't
Ongiara 'Great Lake Swimmers' - excellent Canadian rock, you don't hear that often
The New Pornographers 'Challenger' - will have to get some more of this
Foo Fighters 'Echoes, Silence, Patience & Grace' - more together than their other CDs, apparently
Rilo Kiley 'Under the Blacklight' - a fantastic CD, didn't think it would be as good as it is
Gravenhurst 'The Western Lands' - nice

All good stuff. Bored of this, more later.

News

2007-08-08T17:03:00.000+10:00

I have a new job.

And the good news is, that it is not in the industry I currently work in.

Excellent.

Further, it also means a large pay increase. Although I will need to get a vehicle, pay for upkeep, insurance etc... However, on my estimations, I'll still be in front.

Sun rise, sun set.

Anyways, I am looking forward to it. I've sent my resignation to my boss, called him and tried to discuss it, but I can't get onto him.

Oh well, I'm sure he'll get it eventually.

Also, the author of this Korean blog, has left the country on a trip back to Canada. I like Canadians. They are our Commonwealth cousins. Not like those fuck head yanks. I've met a lot of decent Canadians, but few decent Americans. They also like beer, carrying on and not taking themselves too seriously.

I was in Korean in January this year, and enjoyed the second trip, and my partner came with me, and we both enjoyed it. The cold we didn't, but everything else we did.

Australians don't get much opportunity to be in minus 15. And, on behalf of those who have been in it, thank FUCK!

CDs 4 Birthday

2007-07-26T16:20:00.000+10:00

You may be aware that I am a CD freak. I love buying them, and listening to them. I have about 400, and want more. I don't go into the downloading CD craze the kiddies are into, as I like to own them and read the linear notes.

Plus, if my iPod fucks up, I still have the CD. And it has happened to me, as I am on my second iPod now.

Anyways, it was my birthday a while back, and my partner said that she would buy me some CDs, as I haven't purchased any for a while.

I was given a budget, and thanks to CD Universe, I came in under budget. I got all the below CDs for under $200 Australian delivered. Yes, that's right. Go there and buy your CDs, some of the ones I got, weren't even released here.

I remember the Australian music industry crying in the mid 90s about imports and how they were going to ruin the industry. Back then, CDs were about $28, now with the imports now being allowed they are about $30. True, it was parallel importing they were talking about, but still hasn't made them any cheaper. Fuckers!

No reduction in price, what a pack of arseholes.

Back to the story, here are the CDs I got. Thanks to Mojo magazine for putting me onto these, as I purchased them after reading reviews in that mag from their July edition.

Leonard Cohen - Songs of, Songs from a Room, Songs of Love and Hate (amazing)
Traveling Wilburys - Volumes 1 & 3
The Cinematic Orchestra - Ma Fluer
Tom Petty - Wildflowers & Highway Companion (completes my collection of his solo work)
Two Lone Swordsmen - Wrong Meeting 2
Bill Callahan (AKA Smog) - Woke on a Whale Heart
Dakota Suite - Waiting for the Dawn to Crawl Through and Take Away Your Life (an unbelievably good CD)
Richard Hawley - Coles Corner
Jack O and the Tennessee Tearjerkers - Flip Side Kid

There you have it. All hero, no zero.

Later.

An idiot

2007-06-29T15:50:00.000+10:00

That's right - idiot. Alan Didak is a idiot.

That's harsh language but I think he is.

The case against:

Plays for Collingwood
Plays for Collingwood
Plays for Collingwood
Was at a strip club after a loss to Melbourne, sorry, he was drinking with an opponent at the strip club
Went with a dodgy character to a Hells Angels club house
Was in the back of a car when shots were fired at police
Was allegedly held against his will
Now regrets the incident.
Was embarrassed by his actions
Plays for Collingwood
Plays for Collingwood
Plays for Collingwood

These tales of woe are mentioned here and here.

What kind of idiot, accepts drinks and then to be driven around for a few hours without complaining or worrying what might happen? I might have led a sheltered life, but I work around a lot of dodgy characters, and my early warning radar would have been going off about this situation if I was involved.

This whole sorry tale, looks like something that comes out of the end of a male cow - yes, bullshit.

Further, the fact that Didak is now forgiven by all and sundry because he was 'held against his will' (see second paragraph), is quite possibly the most bullshit story since I saw 'The Crying Game'.

If he had thought about the consequences and what could have possibly happened, he would have never got in the car. I think there is more to this story than is being let on. For example who told the police of Didak being in the car in the first place? Surely not him (he admits that), doubt the Hells Angles did, as they wouldn't want the extra attention. So perhaps it was the alleged murderer, who toss this little nugget of info to the police, and why?

There should a further investigation into these numnut football players who think that it is tough and cool to hang out in sleazy bars and not expect to eventually get into some sort of strife. (I know there is a minority that spolis it for everyone else.) Most people know that it might happen sooner or later, that's why most (normal) people don't frequent these places on a regular basis. Most people aren't easily recognisable and therefore not potential targets for those who want to exploit them.

And by simply saying that he regrets his actions is supposed to be a code for forgiveness. Crap. Here's an example, if it was alleged that I was drink driving by the police, and I regretted my actions, would I be let off? I wouldn't expect to be, and I wouldn't be. A football player can regret taking drugs, dealing with very dodgy people and then nothing is done about it again. Because he is sorry, regretful or embarrassed by his actions.

Remember the West Coast player who said Fuck (or similar) after winning some medal? He was sorry for saying it, and also 'forgot where he was'. Yeah, right. He knew exactly what he was doing, and it was deliberate. I swear, but I try not to do it in front of kiddies, and I certainly wouldn't do it on national television. As I would know it is wrong to say that at that time, in that circumstance.

Football players need to be very careful here. There is only so much love to go around. Apologising and regreting what you do is not going to wash with everyone and at all times. It is time to start being responsible for your actions and to grow up. I don't consider them role models, as they are football players, and like any young blokes, they want to root, drink and fight, and not always in that order. I did, and sometimes still do.

But I am older and more responsible than them (obviously). Going out, being an idiot and then saying sorry and regretting your actions is not going to lead to the clearing of your sins. Not with me anyway. I have no problem with people going to strip joints, it's a matter of choice.

Thought given to the consequences of your actions and being responsible for your actions is better than trying to hide the incident and/or regretting and/or apologising for your stupid immature/greedy/drug and/or alcohol fucked actions. I have been in situations where I have left because I felt uncomfortable, or that something bad could happen.

Football players seem like tough guys on the field, but once they get involved with shady characters they are scared and also strangely non fussed the next day (see last paragraph).

I for one would have gone to the police, had a cry, and cleaned my undies. Maybe not in that order.

Wonder what other adventures of Alan Didak will come up?

Stolen

2007-06-22T16:18:00.000+10:00

I stole the below from this site.

That is great.

This week was pretty ordinary. My partner has a cold, so of course, I got it. And I am about to bail soon.

I was meant to go out with my mate Jay tonight, but I am too crook. I am a little shitty about it as I was looking forward to going out, but I have some big weeks coming up, and can't really afford to be too sick, so I'll give it a miss. Bummer.

Anyways, thanks to Popbitch, check this out.

More to come when I am better.

Popular with Koreans

2007-06-15T16:17:00.000+10:00

Yes, that's right. This website is very popular with Koreans. At least that what the Sitemetre at the bottom of the page says.

Got me fucked. Anyway, there is a site called Naver, and I get a lot of referrals from it. Users put in a term, and up I pop.

Here are some examples:
1 I did once
2 Chinny Chin Chin
3 Happy Shopper
4 Chinny Chin Chin (again!)
5 My brush with fame

All the other referrals are from Yahoo and from myspace, and I have an inkling who that is. So there you go, a lot of poor Koreans, obviously trying to learn gooder English are coming to my site from searching a Korean site. It must open their eyes up to a wondrous world, my site.

Dribble written about nothing, read by no one. Excellent. I must tell those readers that I have three university degrees, and only one of them was in English, so you too can reach your dream.

Back to normal. It was my birthday a couple of weekends back. We were at the Gold Coast at a conference. OK, as what happened, I knew was going to happen. No drama. The stunt driving course was good fun, and there are photos here.

Quiet weekend, and the fog is coming in, which is quite unusual for Melbourne. It is very dark and cold.

Well, I am off, as it is a Friday, and I've had enough.

Weekend away

2007-05-25T15:47:00.000+10:00

We are off to Sydney on the weekend. I was given a stunt driving course, and the only available date is this Sunday.

So off to Oran Park for us. Should be good fun. I have a hire car at the moment, as an old bloke reversed into me on the way to work, and did over $3000 worth of damage to the work car. I have been practising my stunts all week in the Avis Commodore.

Not really, but it does handle the high speed entrance to the Bolte Bridge well at 100.

Hopefully my partner will be able to take some snaps of me, doing a burnout, circle work, a jump and some parallel parking like in the Blues Brothers film.

Fly up tomorrow morning, back on Monday, Giddy up. Same next week as I am off to a conference at the Gold Coast. I am sure that will turn into a very pissy affair.

Stay tuned for exciting photos of Stunt-Grant in full Action Man mode.

Myspace

2007-05-18T16:15:00.000+10:00

I have added myself to myspace.

Isn't that ace? This will be where most of my thoughts will be collected though. You (few) readers are important to me and this will still be the clearing house.

I got a report from site meter the other day. No one has been here. Not surprising. As this blog is pretty shit. And I talk shit.

However. It is time for me to get down with the kids, and myspace will allow me to do so. So, if you check this blog, you also need to check the myspace page out.

Easy weekend, and beers at the club tonight. Excellent. Nothing else to say.

The Wonder Years

2007-05-11T16:07:00.000+10:00

These ain't them.

The title of this post relates to the show. I used to watch it when I was a youngster. Indeed, I even used to watch it while I was an undergraduate studying at a university in rural Victoria.

One of the guys who I lived with then, and I still see now, was going out with a girl with the striking similarity to Winny Cooper. This made for some awkward moments, as everyone knew that Winny was hot! Oh, yes, the 'Coopster' was one hot chickster. Especially to us sex starved undergrad students with too much time on our hands to think about (just) post pubescent girls on TV shows - of which there were many.

Being good red-blooded men (come on, argue with me!) we also thought about other girls too. But they didn't think about us. Or should I say, they didn't think too often about me. So I was left to think about many (many) post pubescent chicks on TV.

Anyways, I was thinking about my week at work. Now that I have a competent staff member on the road, it means that I am not required to travel around picking up the bits that lazy fucks used to not do, because they were 'tired' all the fucking time.

So, mostly my week involves driving into work, dealing with enquiries on the phone, doing other assocaited tasks, and then driving home. Sometimes I go out and see a member and help them with their issues, and either go home or come back to work.

One episode on the Wonder Years, Kevin was asking his Dad, Jack, what he did all day. It was for a school project or similar. Jack said: I get up, bust my hump in traffic, do work, and bust my hump in traffic again. Or some such. Anyway, that has been my week - busting my hump in traffic.

At least I'm not paying for fuel.

Bike ride

2007-05-07T17:07:00.000+10:00

Yesterday, we went for a bike ride.

I have often said that just because I own a bike, there is little or no obligation for me to use. That changed yesterday.

Garry, Jay, my partner and I got up early and rode the Federation Trail, from Werribee to Millers Road and the Westgate on ramp. Fuck, it was a long way, and just kept on going.

If you are going to do it, remember that it dumps you at Millers road with no further direction. We took the right turn and rode to Altona and then onto Williamstown and train home from there.

I did just over 40 kilometres. Not bad for someone who hasn't been on a bike for two years.

I am feeling it now. My thighs hurt, so does my back, and my hands. But the special pain is reserved for my calves.

I am related to Henry VIII. Distantly related, I should say. He was said to have 'regal' calves, and they were quite often commented upon. Mine are regal, and sore. I have had trouble with them for some time, and actually see an osteopath for treatment. I have already booked in for Saturday.

Anyway, it was fun. And once my bum gets feeling in it again, and my regal calves are back their suppleness, I will be up for another one.

Ride on.

Anniversary

2007-04-24T15:56:00.000+10:00

Tonight way back in 1997 I met my partner.

It was in the Mount Erica Hotel in Prahran. It was a cold and dark night, and it was very nice.

We went out to Charlton's in Little Bourke street for some karoke. I sang Hunk burning Love by Elvis, and that was it for her.

10 years later and we are still here. But not there. It's been good, and she can do a lot better than me.

Well, here's to another 10. Good on you, Tootsie.

Site Meter

2007-04-04T11:20:00.000+10:00

Some of you would have not noticed the site meter box at the bottom. Using this, I can see who has been on my site.

Obviously, fuck all people have. I will have to start dropping sex type words in at random places like brittany spears sex tape in order to increase visits.

I can also see where people have come from. Some poor American logged on and then logged off again. He wouldn't have been able to get the nuances of the humour (random sex words follow - loves it up the arse). Or indeed the proper English spelling I try to use often.

Most of my visits come from (random sex words follow - big throbbing cock) Australia. Surprising? Not really, as many people's browsers would be run out of other cities like mine is.

Anyways, it's time to start (random sex word follows - free porn pictures celebrities in the nude taking it from behind) seeing who is on here. And more importantly why? There was a visitor from Canberra. Probably the man, keeping an eye on me, as I do post quite subversive things here.

I am particularly interested (random sex words follows - rubber fetish hand job good girls gone bad) in seeing how people end up here. Hopefully the usage of the random sex words will increase visitors. Although they are probably not the people I want visiting in the first place.

By the looks of things, most of my visitors come from within blogger itself, and from people wanting to download free music (random sex words follow - big dick does it hard). Limewire is the place for this, or indeed, this site. One German was looking for Steve Earle's Jerusalem CD to down load, I bet the shit on here freaked him out!

I think the listing of all CDs from my iPod got a lot of them in. Suckers.

I will keep you informed (random sex words follows - thehun.net)

2007-03-20T17:16:00.000+11:00

I am going to stop using titles.

I am tired of trying to think up humorous titles for these posts. And as there is no one out there who reads this Blog, not even my partner, there is no point in me putting up titles for Blog posts.

Yes, I've cracked the shits. And it's you who has made me do it.

I was reading about those poor kiddies who were killed in Mildura. I've driven that stretch of road lots of times, and it can't be a pleasant experience to go through something like that. Poor bastards. The bloke, allegedly, was off his chops on the grog and was driving with his kid on his lap. Fuck, God save us all.

It was my nephew's birthday party on Saturday. Unky G, had a bit too much birthday cheer, but you get that.

We caught up with Jay and Garry a couple of weeks back. That was fucking good fun. We were meant to meet up on Saturday night, but my partner had a headache, so that put the kibosh on that. We will have to do so again.

Later.

Long Weekend

2007-03-09T16:09:00.000+11:00

We have long weekends. I love them. We get Monday off, as many moons ago some masons walked off the Melbourne Uni work site demanding an eight hour day. Not many people here work an eight hour day, but it's still something worth celebrating.

We are going to a couple of friends place on Saturday night for a BBQ. I have secured a bit of meat for the function. And I mean a bit of meat. Thankfully, Jay is a chef, so he can do the cooking. I might nick some of the dodgy aprons we have here for the event too.

Not much else going on. Work, work, and more work.

Although I did find this site, which has cheered me up a bit on a Friday afternoon. Not that I'm sort of cat lover, but I think it is funny, especially the captions. There are some sick units out there to take snaps of cats.

My Nephew Rex, Action Nephew, celebrated his first year on earth on Monday. Good on you Rex. We got him some toys, which he already had, and some clothes. My sister went and changed the toy for some clothes, and that's cool. No point in being naked.

She is throwing a bit of a partay for him next weekend. I have requested fairy bread, and I better get some, or else.

Will be good fun. Best go, as it is almost knock off time here. Enjoy your long weekend if you get one.

Things I like

2007-03-02T16:30:00.000+11:00

Some time ago, I did one of those emailed surveys, you know the ones. They ask you what you like. I think I may have even put it up here on this blog. Although, going by how often I update this, it would be a while back.

Our computer system here has shat itself, but as I have a wireless card, I am still connected to the world, man.

So I thought I would write a short list of the things I like. It may well turn into a long list, as I like a lot of stuff. This is in no particular order, and does not include partner, friends etc, as it is assumed (correctly) I like them.

Long weekends
Tramp Attack
Not having to pay for petrol
My iPods
My nano with the Nike Plus
My Flickr site
The holidays I have taken with my partner
Beer
Korean food
Watching DVDs
Kicking back
Talking to my friends about stupid things
Making up tall tales, and trying to pass them off as truth
Jane Eyre
Reading other people's blogs, as I like to live vicariously through them
Windows Messenger
My external hard drive
My iTunes library
The photos I have on my computer of all the places I have been
Radio station Joy
Mozilla Firefox
My Gant hat, which has been with me through Paris, London, Korea twice, most Australian states and through the South Island of New Zealand
The couch at home
St Kilda football club
Neko Case
My watch
Full Moon Fever
Johnny Cash
Post it notes
Bluetooth technology
My Model One and iPal radios - the iPal has done a lot of kilometres with me
Visiting my parents, and then being able to leave when the stress levels rise
Talking on the phone to a good mate while driving back from somewhere in Victoria for work
Getting in a cab and going to the airport to leave on holiday
Seeing the view of Melbourne from the Bolte Bridge after being away for a while
Hearing a tram late at night going around a corner
Winning a prize in a raffle
Talking to the old blokes at the Auburn Bowls Club, and stirring them up
Getting a pleasant unexpected phone call
Compact disks
Having a beer on a hot day
having a beer on a cold day
Trying something new at a Vietnamese restaurant
Sleeping in
Hearing a friend on the radio, hello Jay
B3ta
The Internet
Grenache – particularly that from the Bethany winery in the Barossa Valley
Foxmarks - handier than you would every expect
Crown Lager
Pimm's
Catching up with old friends
Seeing new nephews and nieces
Reading a good book
Falling asleep
Laughing in my sleep and being conscience of it
Waking up
Knowing poetry
Telling bad jokes
My wallet
Knowing the word 'dyspeptic' and using it in a sentence
Not having to pay for a mobile phone

I'm sure there are more, and I will probably add to this list in time, but it is almost time to go home. Have a good weekend.

Weak as piss

2007-02-28T17:31:00.000+11:00

Yep, that's me.

After all my pontificating about how bad www.buymac.com.au were, I ended up buying the Nike+ from them.

At least I admit to it. I al going to use it hopefully tonight, and I think it will be a good this for me.

Although, I have to admit those hopeless bastards still haven't replied to my emails I sent them through their 'contact us' page on their website.

The service was FAST. I ordered on a Thursday, and it turned up on the Monday. Good news for all concerned.

Off I go.

Why I don't like clowns

2007-02-23T09:15:00.000+11:00

This is the reason.

Buymac.com.au

2007-02-20T17:06:00.000+11:00

Looks like Blogger has forced me to change to the 'New Blogger'. I can't see the differences really.

When I was in Seoul I purchased a new iPod. This will be my third. I have a video one, and it seems to be working fine for the time being. I got the Nano because I want something more portable to take to the gym. And, because I am a wanker, I want to get the Nike +.

As I am also tight, I did a search for the cheapest one. Turns out it was here. They also have this sleeve that the Nano and Nike + will go into. Not bad for under $50. With the Nike + I will be looking at about $100 for the set up. I'm down with that.

I'm no runner, but I like the idea that you can keep track of your activity. And as I want to loose some weight, it will allow me to track my time at the gym, and also to try to better what I've already done. Better than trying to remember it in my head.

So I decided to write www.buymac.com.au about the sleeve, as it says that there is an optional strap to allow you to wear the wrist sleeve as an arm sleeve. I have arms, and would rather wear it there than on my wrist.

I asked them how much the optional strap was and how does one order it. That was on Friday 16 February. No reply.

I put hand to keyboard today as well and basically said to www.buymac.com.au that there is no point in having a 'contact us' section if it isn't checked.

This holder thingo looks the goods to me, so I will have to see if I can get one somewhere else. www.buymac.com.au, you have some shit customer service.
Publish
I will keep you updated.

Seoul

2007-02-13T17:02:00.000+11:00

We've been back now for over a week. Or at least a week as of 10:30 this morning. Who would have thought that a trip back from Seoul would take almost 24 hours? That's as long as it took me to get to Paris - and that was not a fun trip. I would do it again, but it is boring.

Anyways, first things first. There are a lot of trotting tracks in central Victoria. I saw a hell of a lot from the plane. I booked seats on all legs of our flights a few weeks before we were due to leave, at least that way I knew where we were sitting and such. Each leg we had our seats together in a double, so that was nice. I had the window from Hong Kong to Seoul and actually saw a plane flying underneath us - pretty cool.

Seoul was good. Cold. We expected it to be cool, but as I said -15 is fucking cold. We both got very sick on the first Sunday, and went to bed at 9 PM. We got up at 8:30 AM to have breakfast, and were in bed again by 9:30. We got up at around 2 PM, went to Seoul station to see what time the KTX left for Busan, and were back in bed again by 4. And we didn't get up until 8:30 the next day. We were very sick, and still getting over it. We simply didn't wear enough clothing.

The KTX was cool, the fastest it hit (that I saw) was 299.8 km/h. Now that is fairly honking along. We went on a bus tour in Busan, and then back on the train. It was a good trip and we got to see a bit of the country side, which is always nice.

We also didn't each lunch or dinner from Sunday until Thursday - the only thing we ate was breakfast which normally consisted of peaches and a slice of toast for me, and cereal and toast for my partner. Not real good, but all we could stomach.

We still had a good time. The ex-pat lifestyle is not something that I could do. If I was by myself I would be terribly lonely. I know they have friends and stuff, but it seems quite transient, and I wouldn't like that too much. If I was there with my partner, then that would be different, as we would be able to do things together - alone would be pretty hard core.

Phill was good. He has a good job in a decent company and seems to be happy. We caught up often and went out for a few drinks. It was good catching up. There is a photo of us three avid adventurers below. That photo was taken outside the Lotte Hotel, which was just around the corner from our hotel (Ibis). The Ibis was good. It had everything we needed. The bathroom was a bit dodgy, but at least we had one of our own. I got breakfast thrown in for us both, so that saved some cash, and forced us to get out of bed. The location was excellent, as we could walk to meet Phil, and there was a subway station at the end of the street - about 2 minute walk away. If I was to head back to Seoul, I would definitely think about staying there again. The only drama was the fact that they turn the heating up in the room, but we could open the window, so that sort of sorted that problem.

We had a view towards Seoul Tower, which was nice at night, and it was easy to get everywhere. We mainly got cabs as they were cheap, and they usually knew where the hotel was. Most didn't. This was a shit, as it made it hard for us to get home, but it sorted itself out in the long run.

All in all it was a very good holiday. Although because we were on the go all the time, I don't really feel as though I've had a break. It will be later this year before I get any more time off, so I better get used to it. We were sick with bad colds, but we still managed to go out to many places in Seoul such as the Coex, DMZ and just to wander around Seoul itself. I enjoyed it, and I particularly enjoyed spending time with my partner. Next time it will be a holiday in warmer climes, though.

Well. I said I will update the blog more often and I hope to. I've also put all the photos onto my Flickr site, so check them out there. Be warned, once you've seen one palace, you've basically seen them all.

More to come.

Home again

2007-02-08T16:39:00.000+11:00

Well, we made it through Seoul. It was good fun. We both got pretty sick, but I will write more about that later.

It was a good trip. I am going to load up some of her photos tonight onto my computer and then I will post some more.

There will be some thoughts too - excellent.

All I will say about Korea now, is that nothing can compare you for -15 degrees Celsius. Here in Australia (Melbourne to be precise) believe that 10 degrees is cold. How wrong we are. Most of the week beginning 29 January in Seoul was that temp. And fuck it is cold. Every breath you take is like ice knives stabbing you in the back of the throat.

Lots of coughing and lots of snot. Bet you needed to hear that. Anyways, I will put some more up tomorrow when I get details of places we visited so the Flickr site isn't just a random set of photos.

Enjoy yourselves.

Korea here we come

2007-01-24T16:00:00.000+11:00

Fuck. It seems like such a long time, but tomorrow my partner and I fly out to Korea for 9 days or so.

And I am so looking forward to it. It's been a busy week and I can't wait to see the arse end of it.

Tomorrow morning when the plane takes off, all the drama of work goes away. Excellent. At least until I get back here.

All the best to you all.

Almost Leave Time

2007-01-19T17:03:00.000+11:00

Not very often I use capitals in a title, but I decided to today.

I am on leave from next Wednesday. My partner and I are off to Seoul for a week and a bit. LAst time I was there, I thought they were going to run out of beer, so I drank as much as I could in a short period of time. Maybe not so much this time.

Anyways, I am really looking forward to it. One of my staff left and the other has been off crook this week, so I've been manning the office. No doubt I've fucked something up, but it will be found out when I am on leave.

So be it. Here are a few photos of Action Man in Seoul in 2004. Some of the few photos with me in it. I don't like being in too many photos. First one is me at the DMZ in my St Kilda scarf and hat, second one is of a drunken fool.

Enjoy.

Happy New Year

2007-01-03T10:10:00.000+11:00

It's now 2007. Isn't that great!

I am not overly excited about it. But I am a grumpy bastard at the best of times.

New Years was good. Spent it with a mate from the Bowls Club and their family. One person turned up who wasn't invited, but that's how it goes. Let's just say that next year, I won't be spending it with that person. You can put money on that.

I even did the 'Dance of the Flaming Arsehole'. A famous party trick that I haven't done since the 2000 celebrations. And it will probably be another 7 years before it comes out again.

We had a busy last week. Went to see Dame Edna on Friday in 'Back with A Vengeance'. Third row from the front and close enough to get spat on my Sir Les. Sandy Stone is still as sad as ever. And Dame Edna hasn't lost any of her bite.

On Thursday, we went to Moonlight Cinema and saw 'Kenny'. A great film and the second time I have seen it. I would recommend it to anyone. A film about shit, has to be funny, and worth seeing.

There are photos of NYE, but they are on her camera, and once released will be on the Flickr site. Photos on there now are of the Xmas celebrations. Check it out dude.

Christmas - done

2006-12-27T11:07:00.000+11:00

Christmas was good.

Spent Christmas Eve with the in laws in Birregurra. Had a visit from Father Christmas on the back of a fire truck. There are photos, but she hasn't released them to me yet. We had a good feed, plenty of beer.

The niece got a lot of presents. She liked them all. She's good value.

Then it was back to my oldies for Christmas Day. No major dramas. Most of the meat was cooked before I got there, which made my life easier.

I got some cool presents. My sister and her son came along, and put a very nice message in a good book I was given by them both. The nephew was dressed as an elf. Excellent.

Mum and dad had a good time, and there was plenty to eat. I still have some ham left for lunch, but the pork and turkey went yesterday.

I was given a 4 hour stunt driving lesson by my partner. She will regret that in coming years.

Well, it is soon to be the count down to our trip to Korea. We leave on 25/1/07. I am soooooo looking forward to a break, and hopefully then a break from here too.

Keep your eyes open.

Almost Christmas

2006-12-21T14:05:00.000+11:00

It is almost Christmas. I don't mind Christmas. It used to be a bit more hectic when I lived with the oldies, but now I don't, bring on the Christmas cheer!

We are off to her family on Saturday and then back to mine on the Monday morning for the traditional feast.

I picked the meat up yesterday, only $100 for pork, a turkey breast and a ham. Not bad, and I suppose there are a few benefits from working in the meat industry.

My off sider has resigned. went for more money. He took this year pretty easy, average start time of 8:50 and average end time of 4:10. Wish I could work those hours, so I am now advertising for a new job.

Not long now until we fly out to Seoul. Fuck, I am looking forward to it. Giddy up.

If I don't talk to you before, enjoy Christmas, and I hope Father Christmas brings you everything you want.

Fires

2006-12-11T09:32:00.000+11:00

It was smoky here in Melbourne on the weekend. Not good.

There are a lot of fires burning, and some fuckheads in the Northern Metro area decided to start their own fire. How smart. There is a special dung heap in hell for idiots like them.

Anyways, I was up in Mansfield last week, and I have posted some photos I took while driving up there. They are posted below.

On a happier note, my partner and I have booked our trip to Seoul. Excellent. It will be cold and this necessitated a trip to Kathmandu for the purchase of cold weather clothing. Nothing like shopping for cold clothes on a 42 degree day!

They are all purchased and washed ready for the trip to Seoul. It will be fun.

Here are the photos. There are more on my Flickr site.

Weekend

2006-12-04T17:14:00.000+11:00

I know I've been slack and not updated, but I have been busy.

Last week I did 1,300 kms in two days, so you can understand why I've been a bit rooted.

On Saturday, we went to a Drag production of Grease. Fun! I enjoyed it, although I am not a big fan of Grease. We went with Garry and Jay. Here is their Flickr site.

We all had a good time. There was a little dancing which was nice. And thankfully the room wasn't too smokey. We also stayed over the night, as we didn't want to drive home. I had good fun throwing various items of underwear at Jay. Eventually he got up. I would too, if I had someone's undies next to my head on the bed.

That's about it. It was my good mate Andrew's birthday today, and we went out last night for a feed with him. It was nice. Because it was such a late night I am a little rooted now. So it will be in bed after the West Wing for me tonight.

Looks like my partner and I are off to Korea to see my mate Phil. We will be leaving on 18 Jan and back on the 30. Will be cold, but I have done some deals on accommodation, so if we don't want to go out, we don't have to. I am looking forward to spending the time away with my partner. It will be her first trip to Asia.

More to come. Meanwhile, have a read of this story. Interesting.

Back again

2006-11-24T15:22:00.000+11:00

I've been back from leave for a week or so. It was nice.

The following was ingested:

48 Crown Lager stubbies
1 bottle of Pimm's (get into it)
Lot's of meat
1 bag of chips
Various other goodies.

I am particular proud of the alcohol intake. Mind you that from Monday to Friday, as we drove home on Saturday. Pimm's is very nice. Old school, but nice.

We stayed about 20 minutes drive from Apollo Bay up in the hills, so there was nothing around us, which was good. I had some dreams of driving down to the newsagent for the paper everyday, but gave that the arse, as it took about an hour for the round trip. Fuck that, as there was drinking to be done. And by the number of stubbies we got rid of, there were a lot.

Anyways, I've put some more pics at Flickr, so check them out. I am waiting to download some of HRH's camera too, and when I do, they too will go up there.

I was sick last week - food poisoning. Christ, I don't want to be sick like that again. I am only now starting to feel a little more human. I know it's all relative, but I would rather feel like this than that.

Get into the new Mozilla. It is ace and comes with a spell checker too so I won't fuck up my typing.

My mate Andrew and his lady have returned from India. That's good news, I will be catching up with you soon Anden, and I expect a full and frank discussion of the weirdness of India.

I got a shout out on Joy Melbourne, by Jay. I was asleep at the time, or recovering from the drink session we had at Transport on Friday night. Jay is a volunteer there on Saturday mornings on this programme. I let out the secret on Friday night that I like Steps, and there was a dedication to me and it was Tragedy. I am shitty that I missed it too. Maybe this weekend I will get my shout out. Listen in people and hear some great music.

More to come.

Almost leave time

2006-10-31T17:32:00.000+11:00

I thought I was going to get a bigger pay rise this year. Turns out all I got was a CPI one. Can't complain, at least I got something.

Due to the fact that we are saving at the moment, there will most likely be no overseas trip for us this year.

It is a drag, and I did want to get back to Seoul to see Phil, but he is looking at returning to Oz in Jan, so we will piss up then, no doubt.

Anyway, my partner knows that I am hopeless with booking stuff, so she has booked us a house at Apollo Bay. Sounds very nice. This will be my only leave this year, so I will be using it to do fuck all.

The house she has booked is about 10 kms from the main town, so hopefully we won't be getting any mystery visitors. I am looking forward to sitting on the balcony, looking out at the native flora and fauna and drinking some sort of alcoholic beverage. Sounds ideal.

And there is a member down there too, so that means I'll be able to get some decent meat and meat products. He might even look after me. One can only hope.

I will be taking photos when I am there too, so stay tuned as I might even load them up when I am down there.

Developing...

No one thinks you're funny

2006-10-26T17:23:00.000+10:00

Probably not.

That's something my Mother says still to us. The oldies are in Townsville at the moment seeing the nephews and my brother and sister in law. I've been put in charge of watering thier garden. Which I have done.

Last night it got the mother of all soakings.

Anyway, I've put some more photos up on Flickr. These were of a cycle ride my partner did from Sorrento to Melbourne. I did it too. In a car. A lot more easier.

Check the photos out. I've also been seeing my nephew Rex a bit too. When my partner releases the photos, I'll put them up on the Flickr site too, as with the photos from our trip on the tram restaurant.

That sounds fucking ace!

A year

2006-10-17T15:50:00.000+10:00

I've been blogging for a year now.

What fun!

I don't know how many read this, nor do I care. It is mine and that's it.

My new blogger resolution is to blog more often.

My Flickr site has photos on it. Check it out dude.

Friday

2006-09-15T14:45:00.000+10:00

I've had big week. I run a competition here, and it was mentioned on the ABC local radio, and I am due for an interview with them at 3:10. Get onto abc.net.au and check out Victorian Statewide drive - I'm a star!

Anyway, it was a big week. Yesterday was very tiring, especially after doing over 580 kms on Wednesday. Hard yards, man.

So tonight my partner and I, a good friend from my school days and his girlfriend are going on this.

I've been before, as I took my partner on it for her birthday - never let it be said that I don't know how to show a lady a good time.

My mate and his girlfriend are off to India for a couple of weeks, so it is time for them to enjoy some Melbourne sights before they go. And the drinks are free on the tram, so I might roll off it!

I've put some more photos on the Flickr site too. My sister had a birthday and there are some shots there from that night. Including shots of my brother playing in his band. Check it out here.

Here's a photo of the road from Raywood back to Eaglehawk. I have relatives up there and dropped into see them yesterday. It was most pleasant. As you will notice, much of Victoria looks like everywhere else.

More to come...

Phil - Star

2006-09-11T14:48:00.000+10:00

As some would know, I have a friend in Korea. Phil is his name. There are a few photos (very few, only three) of him and I enjoying my trip to Seoul in November 2004 located here. And there is only one of us together. At least we aren't the same person.

We have had a number of adventures. Mostly alcohol fueled. I even have some photos of mayhem we caused while we were at University in rural Victoria, but these are only on paper and not electronic. Phil would well remember 'Jim the Shitter', and his brother the aptly named 'Shitter's Brother'. Ahh, good times.

Anyways, Phil is now an internet star. There is a photo of him on this website. He was out with them when they were on the tear, you can find a photo of Phil under 'Friday Night Out'. He is up the top of the photo stream too.

Apparently, he said the main lady on the site, Shelly, was going to give me a shout out. Looks like that didn't happen, and I am disapointed in that.

I will send a comment to her to tell her that I have put this post up mentioning her site. They look like they have a lot of fun over there.

I never took a camera with me when out on the carpet. Too much chance of having photographic evidence left behind to use against me in a court of law, or worse still in the court of public opinion.

Midnight shenanigans are best left a hazy, sometimes easily forgotten memory.

More later, man.

James Reyne

2006-09-08T16:44:00.000+10:00

I like James Reyne.

For those not in the know, James was the front man, and song writer for iconic Australian band from the 80s 'Australian Crawl'. They broke up in the 80s, 1986 to be precise. That's early.

I never got to see them, as I was a bit young to do so. I have now enjoyed my own renaissance with their music. I have always liked them and every Australian of my era and before knows the songs and the terms, such as 'the boys light up', and reckless.

Anyhow, I was watching MusicMax one night after returning from the Bowls Club. I had indulged in a few beers, and my partner had gone to bed. On came a James Reyne song. I forget which one it was, but it was from his solo CDs, and there was a woman running, who was a dark skinned lass.

In my hazy state, I decided to write down why James Reyne is not only an Australian music legend but also a fine ambassador for Australia. I got to eight points. Here they are in no particular order:

1. Bitch Magnets – this was his first band. I heard this many moons ago and believe it to be true. He was in it with his brother David, who is now a host of some show on Channel 10 that I never get to watch. Although when I have seen it, it was rather funny, and he was dropping sarcastic comments to some goose of a chef who was taking himself far to seriously. Good name for a band, and as James and David are both handsome men, I think it is a deserved name.

2. Australian Crawl – Australian Crawl were a great band and although they only did four albums, their hits were great and they have a place in Australian music history. (Pompous story warning) When I was in Paris, I had to do some laundry. It was my job to go to the Laundromat, (while my partner did something else – sleep I believe), of which there was one around the corner a bit. I speak no French but I know how to use a washing machine. Once I had figured out the washing machines, I had some time on my hands, so I sat there in a Laundromat in a side street in St Germaine, Paris, and dialled up Australian Crawl's Greatest Hits on my iPod, and enjoyed a good hour of fine Australian music in Paris. A memory that although the circumstances were ordinary, to me it is lovely memory.

3. James is big in

Brazil

– I don't know where this comes from, but I have heard it before. Good to see that James is doing his bit for the Australian economy by selling records overseas. His music is well suited to a hot climate and well done. Perhaps the lady in the film clip I saw was Brazilian? Who knows?

4. Solo career – His solo career has also been excellent and they are songs I do not grow bored of. Although I must amidst that the duet of the Dingos song 'Way out west' has been left off my iPod, mainly because of that other singers actions during the republican debate we had here a few years ago – I do not forget. I only have the best of and the message on my mobile when I turn it on is: 'any day above ground is a good day' and this inspiring note is from the song of the same name. He also released an album called 'And the horse you rode in on', which is typical of his nefarious ways.

5. Private school boy – James went to a private school. It was one on the Mornington Peninsula, possibly Peninsula Grammar. I went to a private school too, mine was APS, but I can forgive James for that. At least he is part of the fold.

6. ABC 2 Dig – This is a show on the ABCs digital TV channel. I don't have digital, but when my upgrade to Fox comes through, James I will be watching it! I've heard some banter between him and Tracey, and it sounds honest and decent.

7. Looks good in a singlet – As mentioned before, in the film clip I saw he was wearing a singlet. James looks good in a singlet. I wear a singlet, mine are blue, he has a penchant for white. Each to their own. I have a body well suited to a blue singlet. I doubt James would look as good in a Jackie Howe as I do, or, more importantly, think I look as good as. . Even though in this film clip he wore a pair of pants that I would say were verging on Harry high pants, the addition of the singlet allowed him to pull it off.

8. Haircut – James has had a number of strange haircuts. In the 80s it was short, in the 90s almost a mullet with gel, and now he has become more gentrified and refined in the naughties. He obviously takes some pride in his appearance, and good on him. As an Australian legend he should, a fine ambassador for Australian men to aspire to be like.

That's it for this, I hope you found the above points to be of some interest. Feel free to comment if you have any other points to add to this list.

Thank you for getting this far into it. I am about to listen to some tunes of his. If you ever want to have a beer James, drop me a note, and I'd be happy to buy you one. Rock on James.

Ramblings and LimeWire

2006-08-25T16:11:00.000+10:00

Not much has been going on recently. I was in Echuca last week for a competition which I run here, and that was good. Managed to get on the soup a bit, do some driving and enjoy the days up there. Last time up there I had a freaky dream. I had the same dream twice in one night, and was later told that the place was haunted. Spooky.

Work has been very busy as I am implementing a new quality system for members of the association I work for.

And as usual there is a fair bit of resistance. You get that.

Some people have asked, why I work for an association. The answer is simple. I applied and go the job. It has worked out OK. I get a car, a phone and some other benefits. One of the bonuses of working in the food industry is that I get a bit of free product. This helps with the finances, and also helps with other people as well, as they get freebies.

This weekend sees my sister's 40^th birthday celebration. We are all heading out tomorrow night to see the band my brother plays in. It should be a good night. I have also been getting into LimeWire. It's great.

I like the fact that I can get CDs that I might have purchased and got one that honked and sample it before hand. I've purchased CDs before as I've like one song, and found the rest to be shit. Bare Naked Ladies was an example of this.

I'm sorry I've even said that, as it was a shit CD. I purchased it because a mate said it was good. Fuck. It was shit. Over produced piece of shit. Fuck that was a shit CD. He even said that it was their best CD! If that was their best, I'd hate to hear the worst!

I am sorry I've even mentioned that, as it was shit. As penance, I've kept it as a reminder never to be so rash. And more importantly, not to listen to that mate when he makes musically suggestions.

I've downloaded some David Lee Roth, Van Halen, Fine Young Cannibals, The Grates and Lily Allen. Now I didn't think I'd like Lily Allen, but it is a cool CD. I am now looking for some Tears for Fears, The La's and other Generation X hits. Might even get the full CD of Songs from the big chair, as I had it on vinyl, and was probably unlikely to replace it on CD.

I might even down load the Breakfast Club sound track and have an afternoon of pubescent regression.

Get into LimeWire and fight the power! Rock on.

Mission accomplished

2006-08-21T15:49:00.000+10:00

Hello again. Been awhile, but you get that.

I have been busy. In my spare time I have been putting the shots of the CDs I have on the iPod onto into my iTunes and then onto my iPod. I have over 3800 songs, and in the last week or so I have added over 1500 images for the tracks. It is still uploading now, and has taken about 30 minutes to do. Hard work, but rewarding.

Anyone listening to 3MA in sunny Mildura would have heard my dulcet tones on the wireless. A media star.

I have a photo below looking towards the Grampians from the Murtoa Road, up from Horsham. It was windy and shows how desolate the area up there is. It's pretty green though. Good for the cockies.

I noticed also that the new series of the Ricky Gervais podcast starts in a couple of days time. I enjoyed the first two and will be getting these two also.

I also got a new external hard drive, and the IT dude we use here set up a script that updates only one section of my hard drive so that if this one on this computer shits itself, I have a copy of my iTunes and photos. Happy days.

We had lunch with my sister on the weekend, as it is her birthday this week. Good news. Her son is looking good. He is going to be a big boy.

Best get back into it. wall to wall, fuck all

Vale 205

2006-08-07T18:21:00.000+10:00

I used to have a fast car. It was a Peugeot 205 GTi. It went fast. And it was only a 1.9 litre. When I was in France, I saw one from the cab, and told the cabbie that I had one. He nearly had a crash, and kept asking me about it. I felt like a celebrity. Only time that's happened. He was also doing 170 km/h without a seatbelt on. When I saw the speedo hit 160 km/h, I put mine on.

I purchased it in 2000. It was a good unit. I did a lot of kilometres in that car. When I had a period of unemployment, it was my main source of employment as I used to use it to deliver food at night.

It had a few small issues. An oil pressure hose burst twice, dumping the sump on the road. Once it happened when I was doing 40 kilometres an hour, the second time it happened was when I was doing 110. That was enough of that! So I got it fixed, and it never occurred again.

However. With the tightening of the belt that is needed in these new Howar/Costello times. I decided that it was time for it to go. I was rarely driving it, and it was not a new car, having been manufactured in 1987. I did not advertise for it to be sold, as I wasn't too keen on some young idiot getting it and thrashing it into the ground or using the boot space to put some sub-woofers into. Instead I had an enquiry from my brother.

He has a mate, who is much more handy than I will ever be. Merv is his name. And he wanted a project. Now, the 205 is a good unit. It was pretty much stock standard, in all regards. There was very little that I did to it, because I didn't need to. It had an aftermarket sunroof, but that was put in in 1989, and was very expensive for its time. It still worked and the majority of the time when I was driving it, I had it open. Not all the way, just tilted open to get some air circulating through the car.

Anyhoo, Merv came over, liked what he saw, I told him the price and the deal was done.

He came by a week or so later, and picked it up. Mind you the alternator was broke, so I fixed that ($700 later). But it had to be.

I was very sad to see it go on the 28 July 2006. It is the second longest relationship I have had. My partner and I have been together for nearly 10 years (10 great years! As she reminds me), and I had this car for six. Only my animal companions have been around longer.

It was a sad day to see the 205 go. I will never own one like that car again, as it had only done 187,000 kilometres and I was the third owner.

I know that Merv is going to look after it. He once put a V8 into a Austin-Healy. And he got booted out of the A-H car club too, because of that. He will be a good owner, and has promised me that I can come and visit it.

I saw his son, Owen, too (you can check out his work here). Owen did the work on my shoulder of Elvis' TCB sign. I told him I would catch up and he could do some more. He was pretty interested in that. And since I am now a convert to the blue singlet, I should be able to fit in even more.

So, it is with a heavy heart I say Vale 205. Merv, I hope it brings you as much fun as it did me. Here are some pictures of it for me and you to remember it by.

Been a while

2006-07-25T17:52:00.000+10:00

I go away a bit for work.

On Wednesday of last week I did 760 kilometres in a day. I was pretty tired. It was for a competition I run here for work.

Anyway it was a long day. We (my off sider and I) did the last quarter together in the one car so we could share the drive. I had a nice neenish tart and quiche in Casterton.

I needed that as I was very hungry. My off sider said he almost started crying when I told him that the lady in the take away food place said that she had just 'turned off the fat'. As he was desperate for a dim sim.

We also had a few beers. I knocked off 4 from Portland to Warrnambool, and then about another 8 pots in the pub over dinner. One time I will take some photos of the fun and games.

I have also been in the process of putting the artwork of the CDs on my iPod on iTunes. This way I can look at the CD cover while the song is playing. What good this will do is beyond me, but that’s how it goes.

I know I made a commitment to you my readers to blog more often, but I've been a bit busy and am trying to do so more often.

Later…

A blog about a cat

2006-07-10T17:09:00.000+10:00

There is a website I sometimes visit.

It is very silly. Some may not think so, but I do. Not only is it silly it also is my kind of silliness.

Ladies and Gentlemen: I present to you Pollock_lechat.

This is a great site (almost as good as this one). It is of a French cat that lives in Paris. When my partner and I were in Paris last year, I believe the kitty was on the same street (sorry le street) as we were on. Or very close to it.

This blog tells of Pollock’s adventures. I can’t read French, so I look at the pictures. He does fuck all. Typical Frenchy.

All he does is sit in the window and look at people. Sometimes there are photos of home playing around. Whoopee.

He is good though. Poor little bastard. I bet he’s never been running around in the grass as my cats used to do.

Our family has had a number of cats. One was called Nicky, and he was a street fighter. He had big testicles (literally) and died through an infection he got after punching on with the other local street tough cats.

Another was Honey. My sister named him, and yes, he has a he. At least until he had his scrotum removed. I was going to school one day (probably around 1987) and say Honey on the street laying down. I yelled to him, as he was a pretty cool cat, to get off the street. He didn’t. I went up and there was a little bit of blood coming out of his mouth. He was dead. I think he was hit by a car. We buried him in the backyard, near the BBQ, this was where Nicky also went.

The last cat we had was called Stinky. Mum used to call her Missy, but she was Stinky to us. She was an abused kitten that my bleeding heart sister took pity on, and then dumped at Mum and Dad’s place when she moved out. She was covered in these scabs, was small and eventually got cancer of the mouth, so she looked like she was constantly smiling. She was also known as Stinky the Smiling Cat.

My mated used to kid nap her and take her for rider in their cars. One time, my brother and I tried to see how much mince meat she would eat. We stopped at half a kilogram. She was keen on more.

One time I was coming home from school (circa 1988) and there was a big turd on the bricks that run around the veranda of Mum and Dad’s place. I could see it from the footpath, and I said “how did a dog get up there and have a shit?’.

I went to investigate. And it was about a foot long. It was a FUCKING HAIRBALL! Dad had to get the hose onto it just to move it. It was feral.

Eventually the vomiting up of massive hairballs had it toll on Stinky. Her stomach dropped, and like one of those sausage dogs when they get old, started to scrape along the ground.

Secret: none of us (Dad and I) really liked Stinky.

Dad decided to take Stinky to the Vet. He was shitty at having to spend money on her. Actually, Dad would have been shitty about having to spend money. So he takes Stinky to the Vet. The Vet says that she is just about fucked (not a direct quote).

Vet asks Dad if the cat is a family pet. Dad says yes. Vet asks if Dad wants Stinky to be given a shot that will allow her to die at home, with the family.

Dad says no, and that it would be OK for Stinky to pass away at the Vet, as it would ‘cause the kids too much distress’.

I think it is now time to revisit the paragraph above title ‘Secret’.

Anyway, Stinky passed away in a Vet. I don’t think she minded as she was close to fucked, and couldn’t walk or eat. I’m sure she’s in a better place, at least at our place in the late 80s she got all the food she wanted and the occasional treat. The dogs didn’t hassle her too much.

Anyway (twice in one blog post - excellent grammar), the reason for this reminiscing is that Pollock looks like Stinky. I hope that Pollock doesn’t hock up a foot long hairball like Stinky did, or leave traces of manure on the carpet, or sneeze in your face, or wee on the carpet, or scratch the carpet, or sleep all day and also all night.

We never had another cat after Stinky. I think Dad got fed up with them. We had a dog for a while, Jessie, she was great. But like us all, she got old and had to be put down on the advice of a German trauma doctor who used to live across the road from my parent’s place.

The world is a strange place.

It’s official: Text messaging is no longer the hip way to communicate

2006-06-30T16:37:00.000+10:00

I was watching the news. As I like to keep up with current events.

It was the time of the Australia V. Italy match, and our leader, John Howard, was overseas selling some sort of Australian good to others for nothing.

Anyway, there he was, in his tracksuit looking splendid. And it’s always nice to see the Aussie tracksuit, as the only other place it gets seen is at the TAB or at Highpoint Shopping Centre.

They were both there, him and his missus. I don’t have a lot of time for Mrs Howard. Everything I have heard about her reflects this point further. She goes to Canberra, but rarely stays in the lodge, she goes back the North Shore house the government gives them. She is no patron of any charity or other benevolent society, and I think someone in her position should be at least doing something.

There she was in all her tracksuited glory texting on her mobile phone. She was even doing it with her index finger. Christ, spare me. If the Prime Minister’s wife can’t afford to use a phone then fuck off.

I would be doubtful if she has paid for anything over the last 10 or so, why the fuck does she need to text someone? And she was overseas as well. No doubt enjoying a trip on my tax, and I ask you, why is she needed to go overseas when she isn’t promoting some benefit to Australia. It smells to me like she was on a junket.

Mrs Howard is not some pimply teenage girl who needs to send text messages to her girlfriends on any issue that floats into her head every three seconds. She is almost as old as my Mother, and if Mum doesn’t do it then no one should.

I could get quite mean and nasty here, but I won’t. I'm sure she is a good mother and great support for John on those overseas trips.

It is also Friday and I am in a good mood. So I’ll spare my tirade against Mrs Howard for another day. All I say is that if the PMs wife does it (on a rather antiquate phone too, it looked like) then texting is now official not the hip way to communicate it once was.

Take note pimply teenages! You could end up like Mrs Howard.

I am not up to much this weekend, normal sort of time. I will be at the Club for a short period of time tonight and maybe even back there for s time tomorrow night to help out behind the bar.

That is about it. I am off next week driving around Victoria for work, so I should be able to post some interesting photos of stuff going on while we are away.

Bet you can’t wait for that.

Items of little or no interest

2006-06-27T17:27:00.000+10:00

I have been out again. Today was only to Grovedale and then over to Coburg. But out nonetheless.

I had a bit of a situation here last night. As is my want, I was working back. Suddenly the call of nature occurred.

Off to the gents I trot. The cleaner is there. He is an affable man. Not really talkative, but that's how it goes. I think he starts quite early as he is often cleaning the toilets when I leave at 5:30 - 6. And I have seen his cleaning trolley packed with assorted toilet goodies here outside the gents (and ladies) as early as 5:15.

He also has a rather curious bald spot, not dissimilar to that favoured by Friar Tuck. And he always seems to be in the same blue polo top. Perhaps I will take the hat around and see if the other members of this floor can scrape together enough to purchase him a new one.

Anyway. I was in two minds. Toilet or wait until he is finished. However, the dilemma was compounded by the fact that I needed to use the cubicle, and he had just cleaned that. And he was still hanging around in the main part of the toilet, where the urinals and cubicles are situated.

I decided to wait him out back in my office.

I waited.

And I waited.

And I waited some more.

When I finally returned, yes, he had gone. And I was welcomed with the fresh scent of bleach, which to me, reminds me of my youthful school days, when cleaning the toilet block was done with a hose and seemingly buckets of bleach, by unknown people early in the morning, or at least before we started at school. Or should I say, at least until I started at school and needed to use the toilet.

This cleaning at school rendered the toilet unusable if you needed to go to the cubicle because of excess collections of water in great deep puddles on the concrete floor at the base of each cistern. If your pants were to drop into the water, you would get teased incessantly until it dried. And since most of my high school years consisted of sitting in class, your pants would never dry. But at least you knew the school toilets were clean, at least for a little while.

Little known fact about me: In all my years at a particular Grammar School in Caulfield, I never once used the cubicle. For me it was those toilet tasks only which required standing for my years at high school: 1983 to 1988.

I used to work with a guy at Council (who I am sure does not read this blog) who used to send me an email telling me that he was the first to use the toilet in the morning. He used to tell me with great pleasure that the water was blue, and smelt like lemon. That was until he had finished his morning ablutions.

Ahh.... good times.

Friday!

2006-06-23T16:56:00.000+10:00

Today is Friday. It is the last day of my working week.

During my journey around Victoria as indicated below, I did 1600 kilomtres. That's plenty.

I got sent one of those question thingies from my partner, I usually delete them, but as I am about disclosure, here are the results. If you get to the last question, you are doing all right, and you are all right by me.

1. What time did you get up this morning? 5:30, she woke up, so I got up and watched Australia do over Croatia.

2. Diamonds or Pearls? Not really fussed

3. What was the last film you saw at the cinema? Can’t honestly remember. I get a lot of stuff on DVD and watch it at home.

4. What did you have for breakfast? Porridge and avocado on a bagel – extravagant!

5. What is your middle name? I have two as I am an aristocrat – William Gordon

6. What is your favourite TV program? This Old House – men, working with tools, can’t be beaten.

7. What is your favourite cuisine? I’ll eat anything I can instantly recognise as food – Korean would be up there

8. What foods do you dislike? As in no. 7, I’ll eat anything I can instantly recognise as food

9. Your favourite potato chip? Those hand made ones – Kettle. Although I am yet to meet a potato chip that displeases me

10. What is your favourite CD? I am still diggin’ the Best of Mental as Anything

11. What kind of car do you drive? Company Ford Futura – there is a phot on this blog

12. Favourite sandwich? Ham, lettuce, beetroot and some red onion

13. What characteristics do you despise? Rudeness

14. What are your favourite clothes? Comfortable

15. If you could go anywhere in the world on vacation where would you go? Anywhere but work. Europe and Korea were cool

16. What colour is your bathroom? Stark white (especially when the light goes on at 5:30 AM)

17. Where would you want to retire? With my partner

18. Favourite brand of clothing? See 14

19. Favourite time of day? The few times I get to see my partner, and leaving work time

20. Where were you born? In a hospital in Northern Melbourne

21. Favourite sport to watch? Australian Rules

22. Coke or Pepsi? Neil Young said it best in ‘This note’s for you’.

23. Are you a morning or night owl? Morning

24. Any new and exciting news you'd like to share with anyone? Not really at this stage.

25. What did you want to be when you were little? Grown up

26. What was your best childhood memory? Being carefree

27. What different jobs have you had in your life? Many

28. Nicknames? Legend, Ace, Action Man.

29. Piercing? No thanks

30. Eye Colour? Brown

31. Ever been to Africa? No

32. Ever been toilet papering? I think I have. University was a little hazy. I have been cow tipping

33. Been in a car accident? Yep, only one to walk away

34. Favourite day of the week? Friday

35. Favourite Restaurant? Anywhere that serves things I can instantly recognise as food

36. Favourite Movie of all TIME? Hard to say…

37. If you were a Dollar What would you spend yourself on? A ticket towards somewhere that isn’t work related

38. Inny or Outy? What?

39. Hard or Soft Mattress? I’ll sleep just about anywheres

40. Favourite ice-cream? Vanilla. That was all that was left after my siblings got through with the Neapolitan ice cream when I was a kiddie

41. Favourite fast food restaurant? Not fussed, it’s all good

42. How many times did you fail your driver's test? Once – hung over

43. Which stores would you choose to max out your credit card? I can do it anywhere, I am a man of the people

44. Bedtime? 9:30 and 10pm I like to read

45. Last person you went to dinner with? Tootsie in Sydney

46. What are you listening to right now? Some Beach Boys

47. What is your favourite colour? I find very few displeasing

48. How many tattoos do you have? One

That's it. Too much info there for anyone. Have a good weekend.

Almost done

2006-06-21T21:18:00.000+10:00

Today I started in Swan Hill and here I am in lovely Benalla. On the way today I went to: Swan Hill, Shepparton, Numurkah, Cobram and Yarrawonga. It was a fairly long day.

I took the wrong turn off at Kerang and ended up near Serpentine, so it was a hasty left and then through Mitiamo towards Echuca then on to Shepparton.

The public toilets in Mitiamo are the same toilets and change block used for the swimming pool. I had a peek through the gate and it was obvious that there is no polar bear club in Mitiamo, as there was about five foot of water in the deep end and about 30 centimetres in the kiddie pool.

I needed to go to a toilet, but I couldn’t find one in Yarrawonga, and I wanted to get out of there and back here, as I didn’t have a room. So I had to drive nearly 100 kilometres needing to go to the toilet. I even thought about pulling over and having one on the side of the road, but I got freaked out about Ivan Milat. They were talking about him on the John Laws show, so I thought it was best to wait until I got here. It was a long wait, but worth it.

Tomorrow should be a good one. It’s to see someone here, then off to Mansfield and then back to Melbourne Town. I am looking forward to seeing my partner again. It is not much fun up here by yourself. Although I did have a nice meal in the Benalla Bowls Club for $15.50. Fuck, some of the locals were getting into it. Bit sad, but each to their own.

My odometer now reads 1302 since I started yesterday morning, did nearly 460 kilometres today, not as big as yesterday, but enough for me.

Just about to have a beer, and Joe Strummer is on the iPod, so it’s a good night. The photos below are of the road between Mitiamo and Echuca and then there is the set up I take with me now when I travel around. It is my iPod and my Christmas present from my partner of a iPAL from Tivoli Hi-Fi.

The Tivoli radio is compact enough that I can put it in my bag and travel with it. Most of these motels have shit radios (and when I've been o/s no radio - it comes the radio comes through the TV), and I’d rather listen to music than watch the TV, so I put it in my bag and I have some sort of music to listen to. I would recommend the radio to anyone, as it runs on a rechargeable battery and also on normal power. I use it all the time.
More later, most likely tomorrow night, if I feel up to it.

Big Day

2006-06-20T21:34:00.000+10:00

Melbourne, Horsham, Mildura, Swan Hill. A long way. Actually I did 844 kilometres today, so I have done a few clicks. Tomorrow I head off towards Shepparton and other places.

Not much else to say, but I have put some photos below.

The first is looking up the road to some wheat silos just down from the thumping little hamlet of Beulah. Not much there. The train doesn’t even stop there, it’s wheat only at Beulah. Taken with the N70, so it's not a good shot. The others are taken with the G6.

The second and third are two shots of the surrounding area just short of Tempy on the way to Mildura. That’s wall to wall fuck all you see out there. Nothing around there. If the wheat hadn’t started to come up, it would be like Mars, as the soil is quite red up there.

The forth photo is in NSW travelling between Mildura and Robinvale. Again, not much to see there.

That’s it for now. I'm just kicking back listening to some tunes on the iPod (The Avalanches at the moment) after the watching the Bill. Good bye Gabriel Kent. Time for a beer and a sleep.

Big Week

2006-06-19T09:23:00.000+10:00

I have a big week coming up. I have to go to the following places: Horsham, Mildura, Swan Hill, Shepparton, Numurkah, Yarrawonga, Cobram, Benalla and Mansfield.

This fun starts tomorrow at around 6 AM. I will get to Horsham tomorrow morning and hopefully spend the night in Swan Hill after going to Mildura. Then it will be off to Shepp, and probably staying in Benalla on Wednesday night and back to Melbourne on Thursday after going to Mansfield.

I reckon I will do between 1,500 and 2,000 kilometres in the next three days. Not too bad, not as bad as the time when I did nearly 1,000 kms in a day. It is a bit of a way, and the drama is that there are not that many to see in betwen, but I will get it done, and see a few others in the mean time.

Now that I have the wireless internet connection, I will be able to update on the road from my shitty motel room. I will add updates as I go along. Maybe even a few photos of things I find interesting along the way.

Make sure you check out the new link on the left which I have just added. It is a journal of a US Medic serving in Iraq. I'm not saying that I agree or disagree with what he is doing over there, everyone has a job to do, but the blog opens your eyes to waht else is going on in the world that is a little different to our day to day lives. I think he is a brave boy to be over there. Have a read and let me know what you think. You can do so by clicking the 'comments' link at the end of this posting.

Cheers!

Weekend away

2006-06-14T18:14:00.000+10:00

We went away to Sydney for the weekend. It was the Queen’s Birthday long weekend here in Victoria. And most states of Australia, except for Western Australia, but they have failed to matter since the thirties when they tried to move back to being a British colony, instead of part of the Australian Commonwealth.

The reason for this jaunt was that St Kilda was playing the Sydney Swans and a friend and I thought it would be good fun. And a trip away, is a trip away.

Anyway another friend and her husband and their parents came along also. The more the merrier.

We stayed at the Sheraton on the Park. It was very swish. Fancy indeed. This was our room. The trip reports on Trip Advisor are a bit up and down. We found it be OK. The air conditioning was up full blast hot when we came in, they knew we were from Melbourne, but that was just silly. The only drama we had was when my partner ordered pancakes for breakfast and instead of that was given the full breakfast. Not being a complainer (they don’t know her), she soldiered on and ate what she could of the breakfast. It was a bit stuffy though and you couldn’t open the windows. We did order a maxi cab for the trip to the airport on Sunday, which never turned up. Not their fault I suppose.

I heard a person at the reception complaining about something in their room when we were checking out. People have high expectations I think. I stay in motels in rural and regional Victoria as part of my work. These places are basic to say the least. I try to get a Best Western if available, and these are suffice for me. The Sheraton is just an upgraded version of these. You get the same basic thing, but they are only flasher. I try not to expect too much, so I don’t end up disappointed. Try staying in the Dimboola Motel or the Mallacoota Hotel on a winter’s night for a comparison. Whingers.

The flight from Melbourne to Sydney was rather uneventful, but full. We got into the Qantas club, kicked back and flew in. We trained it to the hotel and went for a walk around Sydney in the afternoon, as it was nearly 5 when we got in. We did go to this great hobby shop. That is one cool place. I would be doubtful if there were more dorks in one area anywhere else in Sydney. I was proud to be part of that throng!

On the Friday night the seven of us went for a feed at Star City’s Astral Restaurant for a feed. I am not one for hyperbole, but this is a great place and well worth your custom. The views are excellent, the service not too intrusive and the food magnificent. I don’t think I’ve ever enjoyed a meal in Sydney more. And if I may, made all the better by the company. It was late when we left the great restaurant, so it was off to bed for me.

On the Saturday morning we trekked over to Darling Harbour for breakfast. Serviceable. My partner and I then went on a trek around Sydney. I enjoyed it. Until the death march across the bridge (more photos at my Flickr site). See left. She, with her female charms made me walk across the Harbour Bridge. No biggie there. But she dropped it that she wanted to walk back the other way. Nope. She said she wanted to see the view from the other side, I retorted thus: “you should have turned around then”. We got the train back the other way.

Then there was more walking. I honestly can’t remember where we went, but I do remember a beer in a hotel. Actually there was more than one. There were lots and Sydney serves schooners, not pots, and they are refreshing! A ferry ride was reversed to get back to Circular Quay. I prefer the Frankston dialect of saying Quay as kway. Charming.

It was back the hotel for a quick sleep then off to the footy. St Kilda won Sydney didn’t. Although we were lucky to win. There was a young street tough (at least 12) who kept giving my mate a greasy each time he walked past, which was every 10 minutes (not really, but it seemed like that). I am sure he was secretly attracted to this friend and had to go to the toilet for other reasons. Boys know why.

The football was good. It was wet and there was a shit fight trying to get a cab. But Action Man came to the rescue and got a maxi cab for the seven of us. It only took like an hour to get from the SCG to the Sheraton. Not suitable Sydney.

Anyway, we had a few drinks that night and went to bed. Sunday was the last day and we went out for a coffee and a walk around. My partner ordered pancakes, but ended up with a full breakfast. What’s up with that? That wouldn’t happen at the Dimboola Motel.

So we had some scones at the QV building and got cabs to the airport. The flight out was rough. I thought I was going to have a little vomit at one stage. But I sat there and read my book, stoically.

That was about it. A lovely trip, made all the better by the enjoyable company. If St Kilda is going to thump Sydney again next year, we might have to go up there again. I could get used to staying in the Sheraton. So much nicer than the Dimboola Hotel, and the freaky owner wasn’t always hanging around.

Birthday Boy

2006-06-07T14:09:00.000+10:00

It was my birthday on Saturday. I am now 36. I am also more mature than I was last year when I was only 35.

The weekend was lovely. My partner’s sister came up and had her daughter with her. She is a great little kiddie. She cracked the shits on Friday night, I wasn’t here. I was at the Auburn Bowls Club.

I shouted the bar. It cost me $18. I was popular there for a short period of time.

Anyway, on Saturday we went to George’s in Camberwell for breakfast. I had something called “Eggs Atlantic”. It was eggs with hollandaise sauce and smoked salmon. Let’s just say that I won’t be having that again.

My partner had booked a mystery weekend at the Grand Hyatt. I wanted the same room that Gary Ablett was in with that young chick who dies. But it wasn’t to be.

The room was nice, comfy and had everything we needed. For dinner, I was taken to Limeleaves in Little Burke Street. That too was nice. I had some cocktails, beer and wine. Probably a bit too much going by how bad I felt on Sunday.

Sunday was time for Yum Cha with the family here in Melbourne. My sister came up with her partner and young Rex. We got him some clothes from Pumpkin Patch in Camberwell as they are going to their pad on Flinders Island. It was all warm clothes for the young fella.

Mother and father were there. Dad uses a knife and fork to cut up his yum cha. My brother came as well, and his new lady friend was also there. I got some presents, which is always nice, but not the point.

I felt shit all day. Mainly due as a result of too much indulgence. Once we dropped mother and father off, we came home. I think we were home by 12:30, and we were both asleep by 1:30. Woke at 4:30, sat on the couch and did nothing for the rest of the day.

Nice weekend that. We are off to Sydney for the St Kilda match on Friday, so I have another short week. Magic.

I will post some more photos onto the Flickr site soon, so stay tuned. My photos of my trip to Korea will be up there next. I am also going to take the G6 to Sydney with me, so I might even get a few photos onto the Flickr site of my adventures in Sydney.

Keep on truckin'.

Here comes wireless

2006-05-31T17:11:00.000+10:00

Hello again dear reader.

I had to get a laptop for work. That's a long story in itself and one I won't go into here.

Anyway... I've got one. I use it at work, but I have dial up through Alphalink. It's pretty good, but slow. If I was to wait around for this stuff to load up, I'd be older than I am now.

So I decided to get into wireless broadband. My partner is studying for her Master of Arts (I've already got one of those), and she is often on the one phone line we have. The solution was for me to get wireless broadband. So I did.

Telstra has come to the rescue again. It should be all right. But as I am not the person who has the home phone account in thier name, dramas are expected.

Mainly for me. Telstra is hopeless. Useless idiots, I told the nice lady (Hannah) where to send it and to whom. Turns out, it came here, with my partner's name in it and only a partial address. Lucky there are nice people on the floor otherwise I would have never seen it.

Tonight I will attempt to set it up. Should be great fun (yawn). Jeez the antenna thingo looks a bit cheap. The Optus one looked a lot sturdier. Will have to see.

But the idea of getting the wireless in the first place, is that they are merging all our internet stuff here into a server in Sydney. We suspect it is so they can monitor what we are up to. Would not be the least bit surprised if this is the case.

With the wireless card, I can do my surfing at home, and with the 20 hours of downloads a month, it should be hunky dory. There are a few things I want to look at on a regular basis (not the hun!) and the only way I can do it without alerting people is doing it at home.

And the wireless connection means I don't have to sit in the cold study to see what's out there. Excellent. I will report more later, Captain!

Not much really

2006-05-15T17:04:00.000+10:00

I'm trying to update the Blog a bit more often, as I am committed to my (admittedly very few) readers.

I am even going to start putting up stuff that I have written moons ago. Hopefully you will find them worthwhile and may even get a laugh out it.

Most of it was the under grad 'yeah beer - boo government' type of rant, but I like to think I've matured since then. However, the disturbing post regarding Highpoint Shopping Centre might put pay to that.

I've finally got a full Flickr account too. So I am now putting up a bootload of photos I've taken since I got my digital camera. For those of you who don't know, I purchased it while I was in Korea seeing my good mate Phillip, who lives over there now.

He spoke in the native tongue, waved his hands in the air, yelled a bit and then called me over. He got me a good deal and the price I paid for it over there, including a memory card, is less than they still cost over here. And I got it in Nov 04. It's a Canon G6, does more than I need. But I don't like using things that are smarter than me, so I leave most of the functionality off it.

I was trolling through the computer here and found this photo:

This was the first day I got the car to the right. It is a company car and does everythng I need it to do.

When I got the Futura in March 03, it had just under 6,000 kms on it. It now has nearly 108,000. It has done me well. Comfy, eats up the country miles and the really good part, is that it has the special XR6 sports suspension on it. So it is actullay about 3-4 inches lower than the standard Falcon.

What that means is that it sits lower to the ground, and therefore scrapes against every thing. Speed humps - scrape. Gutters - scrape. Concrete parking stop things in car parks - scrape. I've recently had to replace the front stone gaurd as that was broken.

The only major damage to it is a scrape down the side where some idiot hit me in a car park. That's it. When they get rid of it in a year or so, they might get $7,000 as a trade in. Good luck.

More later.

iPod #3

2006-05-11T18:04:00.000+10:00

Well it happened. The old iPod shat itself. So I had to get a new one. That's it there. That's a shit photo.

Not a bad price, but still a bit shitty for it fucking up. Oh well.

It's also black, not my first choice, but it is sorted now. I have to get a new iTrip too as Apple change the design of the iPod so my old one won't work now.

I think the new iTrip is better than the old anyway. It doesn't matter how loud you have it, the volume is now controlled by the stereo not the iPod. That's heaps better, and it has an LCD display so I know what station I am on.

Problem though. When I set my old iPod to shuffle albums, and then I selected shuffle songs on the front screen it used to go through all the albums on there. This new one now just shuffles ever song, so I never know what's coming up next. Now I have to go through to albums and hit play to listen to whole albums and not different songs.

I know this is what the hip younger generation want, but not me. I want to be able to get a shuffle of CDs. It's not too much of a drama, but enough to shit me. But I'll get through it.

The video feature is pretty cool too. Ive downloaded some of the Ricky Gervais podcasts, they are quite funny. And I am now downloading Rendezvous for the iPod. That will be great and should give me a pump up when I need it.

I've also been uploading more photos onto my Flckr account. There is a link at the side. There are photos on there of my cool new nephew, my trip to NZ my partner and I did in March 2005, photos from my European jaunt last October with my partner, and some photos from the Auburn Bowls Club. All good. Check out the Flickr site, as I am putting photos on there all the time, some even have humourous captions. Most don't.

That's it. More soon.

Girl bands

2006-04-28T15:59:00.000+10:00

I have a theory. I actually have many. Most are kind of kooky. One involves a well known swimming star who got booted out of the Olympics years ago. But that’s for another day.

Anyway, my theory is that every 5 – 10 years or so, there is the need for a girl band.

Think about it. There were plenty when I was growing up, the Bangles, the Go-Gos and even Australia’s own Clouds.

And there have been many lately. Remember Girlfriend or GF4? Avid readers of this blog will remember I have mentioned them previously. And about my friend’s perverted buying of their CD so he could perv on Melanie.

What about Sister 2 Sister? They were only a few years ago now. Here is the website. It hasn’t been updated for a while, and at least they are now doing other things like having a singing school.

They must have so much knowledge to impart to their students. Fuck, they’ve even released one album! Excellent. Can’t remember any of the songs they sang, there was one about stealing clothes, but that’s about it.

They also hosted a show on one of the Pay TV channels for a while. One was a good cop (older one) and the other played the rebellious one. If I remember it, the show honked like a room of turkeys.

What is it with them? One seems to be attractive, but the other has looks that can only be born of a spiteful outlook and personality.

The best bit is that you can get your email address with their @sister2sister.com.au web address. I bet people are lining up for one of them! Must be particularly popular with the nonces.

Back to my theory. These bands get popular for a while, then they end up doing shit websites like this one. They don't even update it or put. Crap.

The Veronica’s can’t be too far off either. Surely their faux punk can’t last long. I saw a film clip where they throw paint on a car – now that’s pretty rock!

Soon they too will be thrown on the heap of dud music stars. I reckon you could even interchange the chicks from sister to sister with them, and no one over 35 would notice. Again, only the nonces would.

End of Commonwealth Games

2006-03-29T11:53:00.000+11:00

On Sunday, I took my dear old mother to the closing ceremony of the Commonwealth Games.

My partner was in the act as a performer. She was one of the 1000 Dame Edna’s. We’ve been going out for nearly 10 years and she has some Edna traits. What they are I will keep secret.

Anyways, it was a good night. Nice weather and a fun show. We were in the Southern Stand which meant that everything was happening the direction away from us. That is the main performers on stage had their backs to us.

Prince Andrew was there, so were some other people. My partner said all the athletes were pretty wasted by the time they ran onto the area to see Johnny Farnham perform. I did get a little lump in the throat when Paul Kelly sang 'Leaps and Bounds'. Nice.

I was going to bring the G6 with me, but I thought it would be hard to get in, so I didn’t. Shame, and shame again. Instead all I had was the N70.

As said previous the N70 is not the photographer’s choice. The shots are pretty ordinary.

It was worthwhile coming in to see it. I have photos below that demonstrate what it was like. I’ve even thrown in one of the Rugby Sevens and I know it is Australia playing but as for the other team I’ve got no idea. Probably some place like Nuie Islands.

They’re a force to be reckoned with! Unless the oceans rise the predicted two meters, I doubt we will hear from them any time soon. Perhaps it’s already happened and no one knows that they are all clinging to coconut shells.

There was an 11 minute Indian extravaganza! Aishwaya Rai was there too. So were some other dancers. Some 1000 of them. Good on them Indians. Lets hope they can stop people shitting in the streets and murdering their unwanted daughters for the 11 days of happiness in 2010!

I’ve also put a photo in of the crush leading to Richmond station. Mum took off! She was ducking and weaving. Luckily she was slowed by the build up at the ticket gates. Here are the photos.

Rugby Sevens at the Telstra Dome. Let's hope St Kilda does better there than Australia did.

Waiting for the fun to start!

All the flashes going off at one time, pre-fun entertainment.

Icons of Melbourne. This was when Paul Kelly was singing Leap and Bound s.

Sweetheart girls going out to do thier thing.

This is the Indian EXTRAVAGANZA. Julia Roberts says that Aishwaya Rai is the most beautiful woman in the world. There she is. The first thing she did when she got off stage was to take off her shoes.

This is what she was doing before coming down off stage to kick back and watch the rest of the extravaganza on the big screen.

Athletes on the arena rockin' out to some Farnsey. My partners in there somewhere.

Walking to Richmond Station to get the train home. It was a long night. But enjoyable.

Mum said she "thoroughly enjoyed it".

There ends my Commonwealth Games adventure.